


Just a Dream

by Kyra_Gold



Series: Pieces of Time [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!, ダイヤのA | Daiya no A | Ace of Diamond
Genre: Angst, Apparently I love wrecking happy characters - You have been warned, Childhood Friends, Family, Friendship, Gen, Line drive injury, Memory Loss
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-26
Updated: 2016-12-10
Packaged: 2018-05-03 11:58:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5289815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyra_Gold/pseuds/Kyra_Gold
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Feeling this way was particular kind of horror, having the emotions without the memories." -- Sawamura Eijun</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There are grammar mistakes, but I hope you will like it. ^^

_Sorry..._

That was the only word he heard in an empty, white room that seemed endless. There were no windows, no doors where he could leave, or just go into another room that could be less intimidated than the white colour. He was sitting on the ground, his knees pressed against his chest, head buried in his lap.

_Sorry…_

Every time he heard the word it belonged to someone else. There were voices that were the same, but there were many people apologizing. Why were they apologizing? He didn’t know the answer to his own question. But one thing he knew. He wanted to get out of this place, wherever it was.

_Sorry…_

It made him wonder why the voices were filled with sadness and regret. If they felt sorry, why didn’t they tell him the reason as well? Or at least tell him who they were and what they did? But no answer came.

_Eijun…_

There was a voice he recognized. It was his mother. He could tell she was worried for some reason unknown to him and he didn’t want to make her worry more than she already was.

He raised his head and looked around the room. How big was this room? How high it was? Will he ever get out? He questioned before he looked in front, frown visible on his face. There were doors right in front of him, in a place where they weren’t before.

Looking around, he stood up with caution and carefully walked towards doors, suddenly hearing distant voices. Narrowing his eyebrows, he slowly reached out his hand, wanting to hold for the doorknob before stopping once again. Something was telling him to not open and to stay in this place.

He was afraid of staying in this room for hours, days; god knows how much time passed. But he was also afraid of what was waiting for him on the other side. Was it a better place than this white room with no windows? Or was it worse – room, surrounded with nothing but neverending darkness.

Yet the voices he heard, coming from the doors, made him move on his own. He wanted to see his mother and his friend Wakana, who he also heard calling his name. He wanted to see people that were apologizing, wanting to ask what they have done to sound so regretful.

Just when he touched the doorknob, he felt someone grabbing his ankles. Turning his head and looking down, he saw no one, but the feeling of someone holding him made him shiver. He opened the doors, thinking that maybe, just maybe, he could escape. And as soon as they opened, he heard voices calling his name and blinding light before he was pulled back.

He opened his mouth, wanting to scream, scream for help, but no voice came out. He fell to the ground and tried to dig his nails into something so the one pulling him could stop. But there was nothing. The floor was straight, not a single hole or uneven ground that could help him. There was nothing as he clawed, his nails bleeding, and screaming with no sound coming out of his mouth.

But then everything stopped. His eyes were filled with tears, some already streaming down his cheek, as he shakily stood up. He looked around, for any sign that someone was with him in this empty room, but he was alone. Even the person, thing, who was dragging him, has disappeared. He felt relieved, but not for long.

Looking back in front, he saw the doors closed once again. Without hesitation he stood up and ran. He ran, trying to reach the doors, but they kept getting further and further away. Why? He wondered. Why were doors getting further? Why? He doesn’t want to be alone anymore. He wanted to get out, out of this place that looked like prison.

But the moment he ran through doors he felt pain in his head. He fell on his knees, holding for his head, groan escaping his lips, which only worsened the pain. He shut his mouth and eyes, quietly begging for the pain to stop. He didn’t know what to do. All he wanted was for this nightmare to end.

“Eijun…” He heard his mother calling his name.

Slowly raising his head, the pain long gone, he saw another door in front of him. Standing up, he carefully approached them, looking around and hoping that nothing will stop him this time. He felt someone holding his hand and it made him look down, but there was nothing. Just like before. Yet the feeling was different.

This time the one holding his hand was a soft, warm and gentle hand. It calmed him down, forgetting about the time he spent in the empty white place. Feeling himself being dragged by the arm, closer to the door, he quietly followed wondering – and hoping – that this time he will get out.

Just as he was standing in front of doors, raising his hand, he felt another hand holding for the left hand. A shiver went down his spine, recognizing the hand. It was the same as before – cold and rough. He looked at his hand, a shadow visible before he looked at his right hand, feeling a tug.

“ _Let’s go, Eijun._ ” A voice spoke that made him look around, searching for the source. “ _Let’s go back to your family._ ”

He opened the doors.

“ _Don’t leave me, Eijun._ ” Another voice spoke. This time it was a bit deeper. “ _I am scared being here all alone. Don’t go._ ”

Eijun looked between doors and the empty space behind. The second voice sounded lonely, which tempted him to stay. But he wanted to see his family. Looking at doors he saw a figure slowly forming. He took a step backwards, rough and cold hand tightening its grip on Eijun’s hand.

“ _Eijun_ ” The figure called and reached out their hand.

The boy was captivated by the figure’s warmth and gentle voice. He unconsciously stepped forward, not realizing that the other hand was trying to pull him back. The strength that overcame his body made him pace up his steps.

Now standing in front of the figure, he couldn’t see their eyes, not recognizing the face, but their lips formed a small smile. “ _Let’s go home._ ” The soft, gentle voice held his hand and turned towards the doors that were now only few feet away.

_Home…_

The word repeated in his head as he followed behind the figure. The grip on his left hand was already gone. Oh, how he wanted to go home. How he wanted to see his family again. How he wanted to see his friends again. And the closer he was getting towards the blinding light, the calmer he felt.

The pain in his head returned, making him move his hand, which gained a gasp and not a second later, a female voice calling for a doctor while a pair of hands held his other free hand. Slowly opening his eyes, he shut them quickly after, not used to the sudden brightness. But eventually, his eyes spotted a figure sitting on his right side. It was blurry at first, but slowly the image was getting clearer.

“Eijun…” It was woman’s voice that he recognized in a second.

Blinking few times, the image came clear. Looking at his mother, who was smiling, tears streaming down her cheeks, he opened his mouth and tried to speak, but couldn’t find his voice. He soon looked at doors that opened, revealing a shoulder-length brown haired girl, her eyes filled with tears. It was Wakana, his childhood friend and right behind her was a man he didn’t recognize, but could guess due to his clothes – it was doctor.

Approaching the bed, doctor walked to the other side and took out the small light he had in the breast pocket. He turned it on and flicked over Eijun’s eyes, making him frown. “Follow my finger, Eijun.” He spoke in calm voice.

Eijun looked at doctor’s finger and followed it from in front to the right side and then to the left before it went back in front. He blinked few times and looked back at the doctor, who gently smiled and turned to his mother and friend. He used this chance to look around the room and saw many gifts on the table beside before his eyes fell out the window.

There wasn’t a single cloud outside. The sky was blue, making him awe before he turned to doctor, catching his few sentences. “… Everything seems fine, Mrs Sawamura. We will run over few tests to see if there is any damage now that he has opened his eyes, but I can assure you that everything is going to be fine.” He smiled and looked back at Eijun. “You are getting better.” He added before he left the room.

“You idiot,” Wakana spoke, tears streaming down her cheeks. Eijun quietly looked at her in wonder and slight confusion. “You should have been more careful.” Her lips turned up in a broken smile.

Looking at his mother, he saw her smile as she leaned forward and pressed her lips against his forehead. “You will get better, Eijun…” She whispered.

~

The field was quiet despite being filled with students from first to third years of baseball team. Their eyes were wide, especially of the first-string players, when they heard the news their coach, Kataoka Tesshin, said. They couldn’t believe what they were told, but one thing was sure. It was much worse than they hoped it was.

Each of the first-string players clenched their fists and lowered their gaze to the ground. How could they not see that something was wrong? How could they believe his smile and lie? How could they just…pass it by without seeing the hurt in his eyes every time someone lightly smacked him on his head? Didn’t he avoid the ball? That was what he said.

The silence was heavy and they couldn’t blame anyone else than themselves. A memory of an incident repeated in their heads, which only made them regretful even more. Similar incident happened one year before, when their ace was hit with the ball right in the face and to see it happen it again – only differently – made it even worse.

“Can we…visit him?” A pink haired second year Kominato Haruichi spoke, his voice quiet as he stared at coach despite his eyes being hidden behind the bangs that reached his nose.

That made the first-string players also rise their head in wonder what the answer will be. If it was a yes, the coach, scout and president of the club were sure they will visit. There was no point in lying. And if it was a no, some of them will visit either way, not minding about the hospital rules. Right now they wanted nothing but to visit him and talk to him.

“You can visit him.” Coach Kataoka answered. The first-string players smiled, but their smiles dropped as quickly as they came when they heard his next sentence. “But you won’t be able to talk with him.”

“What? Why?” An olive-haired teen asked. “If we can visit him, why can’t we talk to him as well? It makes no sense.”

 **They will find out sooner or later.** Kataoka closed his eyes.

The three teachers already knew his condition which made it even harder for Rei Takashima, the baseball scout, to keep her face straight. Yet the tears in her eyes were giving her away. She knew that the moment coach tells them the reason why, they won’t believe him. Not until they saw it on their own, by their own eyes and hear it directly from the doctor himself. But even then there could be some players still not believing, or not wanting to believe at all. It was hard for her to be beside and seeing how the expressions changed from confusion to surprise to grief and rage.

All three teachers knew how much the players blamed themselves for not seeing the signs. How much they blamed themselves for believing every time he said, “I am fine,” with wide smile on his face. How much they blamed themselves for believing when he said he dodged the ball. And it only made even harder for Rei to stand firm right next to coach.

“W-what?” There were whispers there were murmurs, everyone shocked by simple sentence before the captain, Miyuki Kazuya, laughed. They looked at him like he was mad, but even they couldn’t take any word for granted. Coach was lying. He had to lie. There was just no way. No way that the loudest and dorkiest player, first-string pitcher, was in that state.

 _He is lying._ A voice spoke in their heads.

“Your joke is bitter, coach.” The captain spoke. “Don’t joke about things like that and tell us the truth.” His smile was still present. He didn’t believe him. He didn’t _want to_ believe him.

“I am not joking or lying.” Kataoka turned to Miyuki, watching how the smile was disappearing off his lips once again. “I was informed by Mrs Sawamura just few minutes ago when she called. The situation Sawamura Eijun is in is more serious than we thought.” He continued and watched every player realize that he was telling the truth.

“Sawamura Eijun—” He hesitated for a second, not wanting to repeat the same sentence again. But he had to be strong for the team. If he wasn’t, then who will when the captain himself didn’t believe?

“—is in coma.”


	2. Chapter 2

The day that the baseball team learnt of Eijun being in coma, was also the day coach Kataoka announced that until further news, he is still a member of first-string, but they should pay attention even more now, because no one knows what can happen any moment. No one was against, though there were some that secretly hoped to take the—almost—free position that belonged to the pitcher.

For many days, Kuramochi couldn’t sleep. The bed below him made him feel lonely. And neither could the rest of first-string players. The sentence “ _Sawamura Eijun is in coma_ ” and images of the bright teen kept repeating in their heads. They hardly focused on the training unless coach called out for them. He couldn’t blame them that their attention was elsewhere. And it was only a matter of time before they don’t come to the next practice which happened two days later after they received the news.

Haruichi was quietly looking to the ground before he raised his head and looked at Miyuki, who was walking in front. There were so many things going through his head, but when they stopped in front of a room, with very familiar name on it, no one knew what to say, less alone how to act. They were lost.

Hesitating to open the doors, Miyuki took a deep breath before he knocked and slowly opened them. He looked inside and saw Wakana sitting by bed, where the pitcher was lying. Hearing someone, Wakana turned her head and slightly widened her eyes before she stood up.

“Sorry for intruding…” Miyuki spoke and walked inside, the rest of first-string quietly following. They looked at Eijun, who looked like he was sleeping.

“Don’t you have practice today?” Wakana spoke and approached the team.

“Coach let us leave.” Miyuki lied though he was partly telling the truth. No one knew they left, though he suspected that coach already knew about their little plan. “How is Sawamura?” he asked.

Wakana quietly looked at her childhood friend before back in front. “They don’t know what caused his coma.” She admitted. If there was anything, she didn’t want to lie to Eijun’s friends even if the truth was more hurtful than lie. “We talked yesterday over the phone and he still seemed normal, but then in the morning his mother called me and said he was admitted to hospital here in Tokyo.” A quiet sigh escaped her lips. “They ran few tests, but nothing came out.”

“So he…” Kuramochi stammered. “He really is in…coma?” he whispered the last word.

“Yes,” Wakana nodded. “I wonder what caused it…” She thought aloud and looked at her friend, who was peacefully lying on bed. The team looked to the ground in guilt. They knew, but they didn’t want to say anything.

“Can I…talk with him?” Furuya spoke, startling everyone. It was unusual for Furuya to actually talk with Eijun after all they were barely getting along.

Wakana looked at him before she nodded with small smile. “I am sure Eijun will be happy to hear your voices.” She looked from one to another. “I will be at vending machine if you need me.” She added before exiting the room.

The first one to walk to the bed was Haruichi and not too late Furuya as well. They walked to each side and looked down at their team mate and schoolmate. No words were spoken; there was only silence, before Haruichi went with hand into his pocket and took out the base ball with different words and sentences written on it.

“This is for you, Eijun.” He spoke, his lips forming a small smile and placed the ball between his hand and body. Silence occurred in the room once again. Making a fist, Haruichi gritted his teeth while staring at the peaceful expression of his friend. “ _Sorry…_ ” He whispered. He knew if he tried to speak, his voice would crack and he didn’t want for anyone to know, even though everyone saw how much of a shock it was for him.

“You are an idiot.” Furuya spoke looking at Eijun. “An idiot for not telling anyone that you are in pain and for lying.” He made a fist. “But so am I… _Sorry…_ ” he added, his eyes filled with sadness, something that the players weren’t used to it.

Miyuki quietly walked beside Furuya and looked at Eijun. He wanted to say so many things – to stop sleeping, to get up and come back, to stop fooling around that it wasn’t funny making everyone worry – but nothing came out than: “ _Sorry…_ I should have seen that you were in pain…”

“Come on, you idiot,” Kuramochi bitterly laughed and shoved him in the shoulder. “Stop sleeping in the middle of the day. You know coach will get angry if you are late again.” He said and narrowed his eyebrows, smile disappearing, when no answer came. “Why didn’t you say anything?” he said quietly before adding in a whisper: “ _Sorry…_ for hitting you on the head and not realizing you were in pain.”

There were so many apologizes said in Eijun’s room that day that it made them wonder why didn’t he wake up yet and laugh it off as he always did, yell at them or just something. They hoped for him to look at them, but nothing happened. Not even a single movement of his fingers. All they saw was how his chest was going up and down, indicating that he was breathing, that he was alive.

Once Wakana came back she was surprised to see only Miyuki and Kuramochi in the room. She could tell there was something they didn’t tell her or Eijun’s mother, but she didn’t want to force them to tell her. If they wanted to say anything, they will say. There is no point of digging into something that clearly showed they didn’t want to talk about it.

“Here is my and Kuramochi’s number.” Miyuki spoke and handed her a paper with two numbers written on it. “Though Sawamura’s mother is in contact with coach, can you let us know either way?” he asked and looked at her.

“Of course,” Wakana nodded with small smile. “If anything happens I will let you know.”

“Thank you…” He bowed with head, Kuramochi following behind. “Some from our team will probably visit him as well, just so you will know…” he said and looked away, avoiding her gaze that told him she knew they were hiding something.

“I understand,” She replied. “Thank you for visiting.” She said and watched the two leave the room. Turning from doors, she walked back to the chair and sat down before taking the ball. “You have nice team mates, Eijun…” She murmured quietly and smiled seeing the words on the ball before putting it back where it was – by his side. “So get better quickly…”

The days passed slowly. It was a torture for baseball team because they expected Eijun to run on the field and start laughing like he always does or start an argument with either Miyuki or Furuya. Every evening, Miyuki was informed and he passed the news on the first-string players. He didn’t want to leave them in the dark.

Seeing there was no change in his condition, they made a promise. They will train and try to keep his position untouched so when he comes back, there will still be untouched place for him.

~

They second-string players were running on the field while first-string was practicing. There were some talking and the first-string players didn’t mind much since some were talking loudly as well. Haruichi was holding a bat and waited for Furuya to pitch, acting all calm despite being overwhelmed with anger, before his eyes widened and all he saw was red. His head snapped to the second-string, completely ignoring Furuya’s pitch that missed him for few inches.

“Haruichi?” Miyuki looked at him when he stood up, seeing that his attention was elsewhere.

But the pink haired second year ignored him and walked over to the second-string the moment they were about to pass the first-string. Without waiting, he held the first year by his collar and punched him straight in the chin. The second-string stopped running and looked at Haruichi in surprise as the first-string widened their eyes.

“Haruichi” Miyuki called and ran to the two with Kuramochi.

“Say that again.” Haruichi was holding the poor first year by collar, his eyes glaring into him. “I dare you to say that again.” He gritted his teeth and raised his hand already in fist.

The first year closed his eyes, waiting for the punch that didn’t come. He felt Haruichi off him and slowly opened his eyes. A shiver ran down his spine when he saw the anger in his eyes and stumbled on his feet with Kuramochi’s help.

“Are you okay?” Kuramochi asked and looked at first year for any bruise.

The student only managed to nod before looking back at Haruichi, fear visible in his eyes.

“Haruichi” Miyuki called. “What are you doing?” he asked, his voice filled with anger, yet it quickly disappeared when he saw Haruichi was determined to hit the first year once again if it weren’t for Furuya holding him back.

“Ask him” Haruichi didn’t move his gaze from the first year. “He said Eijun isn’t in first-string anymore and that his position is now free.” He freed himself from Furuya’s grip that loosened as the first-string players widened their eyes. “I was thinking of being quiet and not saying anything, but Eijun is still in the first-string.” He claimed.

“Where did you hear that?” Maezono looked at the first year.

The student looked at him and gulped, as the tension only grew. “E-everyone is talking a-about it…” He stuttered an answer. “I-I am worried for Sawamura-senpai as well,” he continued and looked at Haruichi. “But he has been in coma for almost two weeks. There is a high chance he will soon go back to second-string.”

Miyuki gritted his teeth. “Who said that?” he asked. He knew the coach wouldn’t say and do anything about it until there is any news on his condition, but he also couldn’t take anything for granted, not when _that_ man was around.

First year looked from one to the other, knowing that there is no way out of this anymore. Either they tell it willingly – at the moment – or they will be forced to tell. They knew that joking around with first-string players at the moment is a bad idea.

“I-it was O-Ochiai-san…” Another first year spoke.

Miyuki gritted his teeth. **Why am I not surprised?** He cursed and looked away. “Go back running,” He said, the second-string players nodding before quickly running off. “Haruichi, calm down…” He looked at the pink haired player. “Sawamura won’t be sent back to second string, you know that as much as I and everyone else in the first string do.” He said and looked at Kuramochi. “And Kuramochi, no funny things.” he added.

“I was not intending to do anything.” Kuramochi raised his hands and shook with head.

“And I believe in aliens.” Miyuki retorted back.

“Jokes don’t suit you this time.” The former murmured. “What are you going to do?” he asked, changing the topic.

Miyuki went with hand through his hair. “I will see,” he replied, a sigh escaping his lips. “But before that we need to end practice first. I will think of something.” He said and clapped with hands, telling the players to go back on training.

Unknown to them, there was a phone ringing in the dressing room. It was Miyuki’s and later Kuramochi’s. Only when they were done with morning practice, did the two players saw unanswered calls. Looking at each other they wondered why Wakana called them so many times and why Rei ran to the coach and told him something before she ran away.

“Perhaps…” Kuramochi murmured in slight wonder. “Something happened to…Sawamura?” he said slowly and quietly.

“There is only one way to find out.” Miyuki replied and dialled Wakana’s number and put the phone on his ear. He waited for few moments before he spoke: “Wakana?” He heard nothing, but the sobs on the other side. “Wakana? Are you okay?” he asked, worry creeping inside him. “Did something happen?”

“ _E-Eijun…_ ” She sobbed.

Miyuki didn’t know if she meant in good or bad way. “What happened to Sawamura?” Kuramochi perked up. “Did he get worse?” he asked, fear spreading inside him like a wildfire. The last thing he wanted to hear was for Eijun to get worse.

“ _H-he…_ ” she stammered. “ _E-Eijun…he…_ ” She couldn’t speak, which only made Miyuki nervous even more.

But then his eyes widened and Miyuki almost dropped the phone when he heard familiar voice behind Wakana. “W-was that…S-Sawamura?” he stuttered, managing to pull himself together. Kuramochi’s eyes widened and leaned closer to Miyuki, trying to hear anything, yet he only few words.

“ _Y-yes…_ ” She replied. “ _E-Eijun woke up…_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahahaha well... I don't know what to say for this chapter then just...thank you for coming this far...


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say that I am not really sure how hospitals are in Japan (despite watching dozens of J-dramas and anime), so if there is anything out of the place, please point it out.

Sawamura Eijun was confused, yet also relieved.

Seeing his mother and childhood friend by his side made him smile, but hardly since the pain in his head was still present.

Yet the confusing part is that he was in Tokyo hospital. Weren’t there two hospitals in Nagano and one in Suzaka? Why was he in Tokyo? But most of all; what happened?

The doctor Nawaki explained him that he was in an accident. He also mentioned he might feel a headache due to ball hitting his head pretty hardly, but other than that nothing should be too serious. Eijun quietly listened to the doctor before his attention went on doors when his friend, Wakana, walked in with smile. He could see she cried due to her red and puffy eyes. He wanted to ask her if she is alright, but he couldn’t get any word out.

“We will run few more tests now that he is fully conscious.” Doctor Nawaki turned to Mrs Sawamura, who nodded with small smile in understanding. “If there are any abnormalities or anything, please let me know.” He added.

“Thank you,” Mrs Sawamura bowed and escorted him to doors before she walked back to Eijun’s side. “How are you feeling?” She asked with small smile and caressed his hair away from his forehead.

“My…head…” He spoke with sore voice.

“Doctor did say you will have a headache for a while more.” Mrs Sawamura replied and looked at Wakana. “Did you get them?” she asked.

“Yes,” Wakana nodded and looked at Eijun. “I contacted your friends and they are on their way.” She smiled.

“Isn’t it…a bit too far…from Nagano to come…?” He asked in confusion.

“Eh?” Wakana blinked. “I meant your friends here in Tokyo at Seido High.” She said and approached him. “Your friends from middle school can’t come since they have school. Even I hardly convinced my mother, but…I contacted Miyuki.” She said and observed his expression that turned even more confused.

“Mi…yuki?” he murmured. “Who…is that?”

~

He had to tell them. They _had_ to tell them before coach does. They had to be the ones telling the news. Both Miyuki and Kuramochi thought as they ran out of the changing room and after the baseball team, who were right before the dorms.

“Guys” Kuramochi called gaining attention of Furuya and Maezono.

The two called for the rest and turned to the captain and vice captain, who were breathless. “What happened?” Asou Takeru questioned in confusion.

“Sawamura…” Kuramochi breathed, his lips turning into wide smile. “Sawamura woke up.” he said.

Everyone's eyes widened at his statement. “Are you sure?” Haruichi asked and took a step forward.

“Yes,” Miyuki nodded. “Wakana called us few times but we were training and I just gave her a call and I heard him in the background.” he said and looked at Kuramochi, who nodded in agreement. “Sawamura is awake.” He was grinning from ear to ear.

Cheers were heard in front of boys’ dormitory. Everyone was happy and excited to hear that their pitcher woke up. If just one day later, it would be two weeks since he ended in coma and some of them were starting to doubt he will wake up.

Haruichi was relieved. Everything was okay, so why was he still feeling sad? Shouldn’t he be happy that Eijun woke up?

The next day Miyuki, Kuramochi, Furuya and Haruichi – the ones that were close to Eijun – went to hospital, to pay him a visit. Miyuki was confused and a bit worried when he didn’t receive any message after the call to let him know if everything was alright. But he didn't mind. He was probably going through some tests that Wakana told him about. Everything was okay, right?

Standing on the hallway, the four players were confused. Wakana was standing in front of doors, looking nervous. What happened? Did something happen to Eijun? They wondered and just before anyone could voice their thoughts, Wakana spoke.

“There is something I must tell you…” Her voice was quiet as she stared at them. “Don’t be angry and I hope you will understand the situation because it isn't easy for anyone.” she shortly explained.

“What happened?” Furuya asked.

“Did something happen to Eijun?” Haruichi was the second.

“Everything is fine,” She smiled, but quickly faltered. “Well…almost…” she whispered and bit her lower lip.

“What is wrong?” asked Miyuki.

Wakana hesitated as she glanced at doors. “Well…” she murmured and let out a quiet sigh. “Don’t get mad at Eijun.” she said and opened the doors, walking into the room.

Eijun was looking at his mother, small smile formed on his lips before their attention was brought to Wakana and the guests. He stared at Wakana, his smile a bit widening before he looked at the four students behind. His smile faltered, which caught Miyuki’s attention.

Wakana looked at them in worry before she looked back at Eijun, who quietly observed them. She could see they were confused why he hasn’t greeted them or called out for them like he usually did. She was sad that they have to get to know the truth in most painful way – seeing and hearing by themselves because she was sure they wouldn’t believe her a word she would say. Which was almost the reason she didn’t send any message; she didn’t want to answer on questions she had no idea how to answer.

Eijun’s mother’s smile slowly faltered away, her expression turning into sadness. She didn’t know how to confront them and tell them the news. They were all special friends of her son, who now stared at them like he sees them for the first time.

“Hey Sawamura,” Kuramochi broke the silence, his lips forming a wide smile. “Look at yourself, already kicking asses around.” He joked.

“That was lame.” Miyuki commented, Kuramochi shooting him a glare, as he looked at the second year. “How are you holding?” he asked with a smile.

Eijun didn’t answer. He kept staring at them which made them wonder if perhaps he lost the ability to talk. But that was absurd in their opinion. If he lost the ability to talk, he already would the day the accident happened.

And the four of them weren’t stupid. The moment they walked into the room they saw Eijun has changed. He was still the same, yet they knew he has changed, they just didn’t know how, but the feeling was there. It was still there and screaming at Haruichi the highest possibility why there wasn’t any reaction from his friend when they walked in.

“Uhm…” Eijun murmured.

They brightened up. He could talk. That was a good sign.

“Who are you?” The teen asked and looked from one face to another.

The smile Miyuki had on his lips was starting to look forced before it disappeared as he stared at Eijun. “W-what?” he stuttered. “Stop joking around Sawamura.” He laughed with force, trying to lighten up the mood that was getting darker by second more.

“I am sorry, but…” Eijun said. “I don’t remember you. Do we know each other?” he asked and looked at Kuramochi, who only stared at him, his mouth slowly opening.

Miyuki was at loss of words. He didn’t know what to say. Somehow, _somehow_ he expected something after Wakana didn’t reply any of his messages, but this, not remembering any of them, was ridiculous.

“We are your teammates,” Haruichi spoke quietly and took a step forward. Despite being prepared for any bad news, he was still shocked and taken back when Eijun didn’t recognize anyone. The feeling he had the moment he heard he woke up was trying to warn him for this – he knew now.

“Teammates?” repeated Eijun and looked at Wakana and later at his mother. “Who are they?” he asked with confusion visible on his face.

“They are your teammates and friends from Seido High.” Mrs Sawamura spoke before she turned to the four players. “I will explain everything,” She sadly smiled and continued as she looked at Wakana and Eijun. “I am getting something to drink. Would you like to drink anything?”

“Thank you,” Wakana shook with head, Eijun quietly following.

Mrs Sawamura nodded in understanding before she looked at boys. “Should we go?” she asked with quiet voice that instantly told them she was tired and saw that what happened to her son had a huge effect on her as well.

The four boys quietly followed her, but not before they looked at Eijun one more time seeing him looking after them. They felt happy he woke up, but sad that he doesn’t remember them.

They quietly followed Mrs Sawamura to the vending machine that was in the main hall. Their heads were lowered, many things and thoughts running through their heads, but they were all about the one same person.

Seeing their long faces, Mrs Sawamura smiled. “Would you like to drink anything?” she asked, breaking the silence and startling them.

“I-it is fine,” Miyuki shook with head.

“It is my treat for visiting Eijun and helping him when he needed help.” Her smile was gentle and warm, which made them quietly nod their heads before telling what they would like to drink.

They were quietly sitting on the chairs and staring at the ground, not knowing what to say, less alone to look into Mrs Sawamura’s eyes. The fact that Eijun was like this, was definitely their fault. And once again they blamed no one else than themselves for letting it go this far.

“You know,” Mrs Sawamura started after minutes of silence. “When Eijun woke up yesterday, I was happy. To see his smile and eyes again was something I wished for the last two weeks.” She could see the pain in their eyes. “And I was even happier when I saw you coming. It let me know he wasn’t alone.”

Kuramochi narrowed his eyebrows and looked to the ground. **Alone? The reason that he doesn’t remember is because I believed his lies even though we are roommates.** He thought to himself, feeling guilty even more.

“Coach Kataoka told me what happened.” She continued making their eyes wide. “Wakana also knows and so do Eijun’s father and grandfather.” She looked at the cappuccino in her hands. “Baseball is a dangerous game, we all know that.” Her voice was quiet. “Even though deep inside I hoped he would stop playing, because I feared for his health and well being, I was happy when he called for the first time after going to Tokyo and talked for hour on how he got few friends and even an opponent in the same team.” A chuckle escaped her lips.

Furuya looked to the ground, avoiding her gaze.

“He also talked about how his upperclassmen are taking care of him with good care, especially Chris.” Mrs Sawamura continued after letting out a quiet sigh. “Despite my fear, for Eijun to get hurt, was getting stronger, I was happy. Hearing him talking about everything in those few hours we talked I learnt one thing.” She looked from one to another, her lips forming a small smile. “He cared for each one of you even though he shows it in a different way.”

Miyuki lowered his gaze alongside with Miyuki while Kuramochi gritted his teeth. They didn’t know what to say, what to reply.

Her smile faltered moments later. “When I got a call from Mrs Takashima, I knew something happened the moment she spoke. I was afraid, terrified, I admit and I blamed myself a lot for not telling him enough to be safe. But I never could tell him to stop playing baseball. Baseball was something he loved more than anything and it still is. I can see he hardly waits to continue playing.” She took a sip of her drink before continuing.

“And as for his condition…” She stammered for a moment. “You have probably already guessed, but … Eijun has amnesia. The doctor, and Eijun himself, said that he remembers time before going to High School, in fact he remembers only what happened before he was scouted. The doctor isn’t sure why he doesn’t remember anything from High School so he couldn’t explain it better. I know it must have been a huge surprise and shock for you when you walked in.” Her lips turned up in a small smile. “But there is also the fact that he has changed in a way I can’t explain.”

“He isn’t lively as much as he was.” Miyuki bitterly laughed.

“Indeed,” Mrs Sawamura chuckled. “Perhaps this incident changed him; for better or for worse, we will see.” She stared at her drink before raising her head and looked at each one of them as she quietly added: “It isn’t your fault.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp...here is an update. I will update it every month or so, so I will have time to write more and do college stuff in between. I just want to warn you that in the next few chapters, the time might look rushed, so I apologize for that in advance.


	4. Chapter 4

Biting his lower lip and glancing all around the place he finally looked at his childhood friend, who was standing beside, warmly smiling. Looking back in front, he let out a sigh. “Do I really have to go back?” he asked and looked at his father, who was standing on his left side.

“You are already a student for two years at this high school and you missed two months of studying due to accident.” Mr Sawamura shortly explained. “It would bring some trouble if you wouldn’t go back to Seido High.” He looked at his son with a smile. “Don’t worry though. If anything happens, just call home and one of us will come.”

“But do I **have** to?” He asked once again, his expression falling by each second. “I don’t know these guys nor do I know anyone at this school.” He groaned when Wakana hit him on the arm.

“You will be fine, Eijun.” She said her smile still present. “Kuramochi and Miyuki told me they will take good care of you.” she looked back at the dorm in front. “On top of that, Haruichi also told me he will help you with anything you need help with.”

A sigh escaped Eijun’s lips as his shoulders slumped down and took a step forward. “I will do my best…” he said and turned to his father and friend, who were looking at him with wide smiles.

“Call us if you need anything.” Mr Sawamura said as Wakana stepped forward and pulled him in a tight hug.

“I will miss you.” She whispered before she pulled away and stepped back to Mr Sawamura’s side. “Do your best, okay?” she waved with hand.

“Have a safe trip back.” Eijun waved with his free hand before he turned and walked towards the first dorm room. He looked back at the gates and saw that his father and Wakana already gone before he looked at the plate with names on it.

“Not mine…” he murmured and walked to the next dorm. “Not mine either…” he sighed and just when he was about to stop, his eyes slightly widened seeing familiar name on the plate. “Room five…” He murmured and knocked on doors before looked at the second name that was also written on. “Kuramochi…Youichi…”

The doors slowly opened, revealing the olive-haired teen. “Oh, Sawamura” Kuramochi grinned and fully opened the doors, letting the brunet in. “Did you just come?” he asked and looked around to see if there was anyone else outside.

“Y-yeah…” Eijun nodded and walked inside, already looking around the room.

Kuramochi looked at his roommate before grinning. “What are you standing here for like an idiot?” he asked and smacked him on the back. “Get inside…”

“A-ah…” Eijun stammered and stumbled forward. He put the bag on the ground and took off his shoes before following Kuramochi to the middle of the room. He looked around, seeing one bunk was occupied while the other was still intact. “W-which one is mine?” he looked at Kuramochi.

“This one,” Kuramochi pointed to the bunker where he slept above while Eijun below.

“O-oh…” Eijun nodded and walked to his bed and sat down. “U-uhm, senpai…” he looked at the former, who widened his eyes. “I-is t-there anything I can do?” he asked.

Kuramochi quietly stared at Eijun for a second before he shook with head. “Not really,” He replied. “I need to escort you to coach tomorrow morning before practice, but other than that nothing else.” He shrugged and walked over to the television. “Want to play?” he asked, holding one game controller.

“I-is it okay?” Eijun asked and carefully stood up.

“Of course,” Kuramochi grinned. “Don’t be afraid so much. This is your room as well.” He said and handed him the controller he was holding before taking his own.

Eijun quietly sat beside Kuramochi on the ground and looked around the room. It felt so familiar, yet he couldn’t remember any of it. Looking at Kuramochi, who was trying to choose a game, he remembered all those apologies he heard in his head. He wondered to whom belonged those voices. Tilting his head to the side he completely forgot he was staring at his roommate before he was hit on the head.

Pain spread in his head, making him put hand over. “Oh shit,” he heard Kuramochi curse. “I am so sorry, Sawamura.” He was on his legs, panicking at his kouhai, who was touching his head. “ _—sorry—_ ”

That one word made Eijun raise his head without minding about the pain that was still present. “What did you just say?” He spoke and looked straight into Kuramochi’s eyes.

Kuramochi was confused. “I will—”

“Later” Eijun cut him off. “What did you say at the end?” he asked.

Kuramochi blinked few times, not knowing what Eijun meant before he recalled what he said. “ _Sorry_ ” He repeated the last word.

Eijun’s eyes widened as he held Kuramochi’s hands. “Why…” he mumbled. “Why did you apologize?” he asked.

“Eh?” Kuramochi seemed surprised. “I…I hit you on the head and…” He became confused when Eijun shook his head.

“In hospital,” The brunet spoke, furrowing his eyebrows. “Why did you apologize in hospital?” he asked looking straight into his eyes.

~

“It is good to see you back, Sawamura.” Rei Takashima smiled when she spotted the said student walking towards the building beside Kuramochi.

Eijun looked at Rei and quietly nodded with a bow before he looked at Kuramochi. The two hasn’t spoken a word since the day before and Eijun wondered. He wondered why he wouldn’t tell him a word.

“Thank you for escorting him, Kuramochi.” Rei looked at the Seido shortstop, who quietly nodded before he left to practice. Rei turned to Eijun and stepped aside. “Let’s go in, coach is waiting for you.” she warmly smiled.

Eijun gulped and quietly followed her. He didn’t know how to act around Rei, heck he didn’t know how to act around coach, less alone what to say. Narrowing his eyebrows he didn’t realize that Rei stopped before he bumped into her back.

“I-I-I am sorry…” he stuttered and bowed.

“It is okay,” Rei smiled, slight confusion seen on her face. She really wasn’t used to this Eijun that was standing in front of her. “Don’t be so stiff.” She chuckled and knocked on doors. **Perhaps the cause of amnesia and change of his personality is because he didn’t go to hospital the moment ball hit him?** She thought as she opened the doors. “Sawamura is here,”

Coach Kataoka Tesshin, assistant coach Ochiai Hiromitsu and club president Kazuyoshi Oota were in the office, which instantly told Sawamura that whatever he did before the incident wasn’t good. He felt shiver run down his spine as he carefully stepped into the office and gulped seeing coach sitting on the chair while assistant coach and club president were standing in front.

“Sawamura,” Club president widely smiled and stepped forward. “It is good to see you again.” He said and patted the student on his back. “How are you feeling?” he asked.

“F-fine, thank you, sir…” he answered and bowed with head.

Ochiai quietly observed him as Kataoka stood up. “Did you get enough rest?” Coach spoke, gaining Eijun’s attention.

Eijun gulped before he nervously nodded. “K-Kuramochi-senpai showed me around on the way here so I wouldn’t get lost.” He shortly explained before averting his gaze to the ground.

Kataoka gave a firm nod before he approached the student. “Did he tell you anything else?” he asked and stopped right in front of him.

Eijun raised his head, but quickly looked away once again. “O-only that I am in f-first string…” he answered in quiet voice.

“I see…” Kataoka murmured and glanced at Ochiai before looking at Rei. “Lead him to the bullpen and put Ono in charge for his pitches. We will see how much the incident affected Sawamura’s play before deciding what to do next.” He explained.

“Yes sir,” Rei nodded with a smile and looked at Eijun. “Let’s go,” she added. Eijun quietly looked from one man to another before bowing and leaving after Rei.

“He really has changed…” Kazuyoshi hummed. “Do you think it will affect his play a lot?” he asked and looked at Kataoka.

“That depends on what will happen in the bullpen.” Kataoka answered and turned to Ochiai. “I believe I already made myself clear before Sawamura even woke up.” He started his eyes boring right through his glasses into the assistant coach. “I make the choice on who to send out of the first string. Though I do appreciate your thoughts as well.” He added and turned to doors, taking his leave.

On the way to baseball ground A, Eijun nervously looked around. He meddled with his fingers and biting his lower lip before he looked at Rei, who chuckled. His cheeks turned in light shade of red, immediately averting his gaze to the ground.

“Don’t be so nervous.” Rei spoke and messed his hair. “Indeed everyone in the team knows you, but I am sure they won’t make you feel uncomfortable. But if you do, then just leave, okay?” she smiled.

Eijun quietly nodded and raised his head when he heard voices coming from the ground upfront. He blinked few times before his eyes widened, seeing how huge the ground was. “It is huge…” he murmured and looked at Rei. “Is this where I played?” he asked pointing at the ground.

“Every day till late at night together with your friends…” Rei’s smile widened when Eijun’s lips turned upwards as he looked back in front. “Do you want me to show you around again?” she asked and walked over to gates.

“Please,” Eijun replied and hopped after her inside.

Rei looked on the ground where first-string was playing a game, not one noticing their arrival. She was a bit relieved, but still managed to catch certain shortstop’s eye. The scout walked to the side, Eijun quietly following behind and listened as she explained him all the places and utilities, to find, on the ground A before they reached one of the bullpens.

“Good work, Kawakami and Furuya,” Rei smiled at two pitchers, who stopped and looked at the scout.

“Sawamura,” Kawakami’s face brightened as Furuya gave a small nod in greeting. The third year pitcher walked over to the second year and patted his shoulder. “It has been long since I last saw you.” he smiled.

“A-ah, t-thank you…” Eijun stuttered with small smile before glancing at Rei.

“Ah, _sorry_ …” Kawakami retreated his hand from Eijun’s shoulder, seeing he was feeling uncomfortable.

There it was again. Eijun’s head snapped in Kawakami’s way, startling the third year. He opened his mouth, trying to speak, but remembering the hurt look from Kuramochi the night before, made him shut his mouth. He looked away, not wanting to say anything that could make anyone make that face. He didn’t want to see that face again.

“Well,” Rei decided to speak, which gained everyone’s attention in the bullpen. “Coach wants Sawamura to pitch few balls to see how much it has affected him.” She said, her eyes softening when she saw the expression the catchers and two pitchers made. “Ono?” she called the third year catcher.

“Huh?” Ono raised his head with wide eyes. “A-ah, sure…” He stammered and walked forward to Eijun. “It is nice to work with you again, Sawamura.” He smiled at the second year.

“Y-you too, senpai…” Eijun gave a small nod.

That caught Ono off guard before he coughed and walked with Eijun to one of the stands. He squatted down and looked at the brunet. “Do you know the signs?” he asked.

“I-I think…” Eijun replied as he held the ball in his left hand while with the right one he held the mitt. He looked at the ball before looking at Ono, who showed at first one finger and then four.

Narrowing his eyebrows he thought for a moment, but it felt like he already knew the answer. **Fastball inside,** he thought and gave a quiet nod unconsciously before he raised his right leg. Rei’s eyes widened alongside Kawakami’s, Furuya’s and the second-string player’s, who stared at the ball now in Ono’s mitt. Ono blinked few times before he looked at Eijun. He stood up and threw the ball back at him. Eijun caught it and looked at Ono for the next sign; two fingers at first and then one. **Curveball outside** ; he gave another nod. Everything felt so unfamiliar, yet familiar at the same time.

It was in that moment that Miyuki walked into bullpen after the practice on the field was done. He spotted Rei and was ready to call out for her, but then he spotted Eijun, ready to pitch and stopped midway. Even though he couldn’t remember the time he spent at Seido for the last two years, his eyes showed the same passion he felt every time he pitched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not sure when I updated third chapter, but, it is time though.. On the other hand I have some happy news. I got inspiration to write again! Though I shouldn't be saying anything so quickly, cause it usually backfires, but I will do my best.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize I didn't update in February. I was busy with seminars and exams and I decided to add few chapters at the beginning, because otherwise it would seem rushed and some (or most) wouldn't like it and be confused by everything. Reviews are always welcomed, be it good or bad.

“Yo, Wamura” Kanemaru looked at Eijun, who was scrunching his nose before he looked his way and tilted head to the side. “Shouldn’t you get ready for PE?” he asked and almost wanted to smack Eijun’s head when the latter widened his eyes and shot up from his seat. “You idiot…” Kanemaru face palmed and sighed with his head shaking.

Eijun grabbed his bag from the ground and walked with Kanemaru down the hallway towards gym. The two of them talked about random things before they reached the rest of their class. Kanemaru pushed Eijun inside the changing room as he stood in front, staring at doors like he was a lost child. Their classmates didn’t put much attention on them as they were changing. And neither of them did spot that Eijun quietly sneaked out while everyone was busy.

“Wait a moment…” Kanemaru stopped in the middle of taking his men’s shirt off. He looked around and groaned. “When did he sneak out, damn it?”

“Just leave him be.” One of the classmates spoke. “He sneaked out the moment you turned your back on him and if you haven’t realized, Furuya is also missing.” He said and put on his shirt.

“I don’t think the teacher will be angry.” Another one spoke. “Furuya is weak on the sun and Eijun has the letter from doctor that he can’t be at PE for few months.”

“What?” Kanemaru looked at him. “Does that mean he can’t train either?” he asked.

“It would put pressure on him, no?” The third one shrugged.

Kanemaru narrowed his eyebrows before he remembered that Eijun pitched few days ago before he stopped coming. He mumbled something under his breath, “Stupid idiot. Why didn’t he say something?” before he quickly changed.

Sawamura Eijun was quietly walking down the hallway in his school. His attention was all around the place as he looked now from one side now to the other. He was quietly humming along before he stopped midway, of his searching around the school, seeing his classmate. Narrowing his eyebrows, he stared for a moment before he pointed at him, his eyes wide.

“Furuya” Eijun called.

The called teen startled and turned around to face Eijun, who was now standing right in front of him. He took a step back, but Eijun took a step forward. Neither of them said a word as they kept staring at each other.

“Do you need anything?” Furuya decided to break the silence.

Eijun blinked few times before he answered. “No…” He tilted head to the side. “Why?” he asked, completely forgetting that he was the one, who called after him.

Furuya quietly stared at Eijun before he turned around and left. The latter quietly stared after him, gaping at his gesture before he followed. Neither of them said anything as they made their way out of the school. And suddenly Eijun found himself remembering a moment when he met Furuya for the first time. He quietly stared in front, completely oblivious of Furuya, who was now observing him.

“Want to play catch?” Furuya spoke, startling Eijun, who widened his eyes and yelped, jumping away.

“Don’t scare me like that!” He called, holding for his chest. “When did you get here?” he asked.

“I was here since the beginning.” Furuya answered. “You followed me, remember?” he asked and furrowed his eyebrows. It wasn’t like Eijun to forget those kind of things, though he _did_ experience such moments before.

“I did?” Eijun sheepishly laughed and scratched his neck. “R-right, I did.”

“So?” Furuya asked. “Want to play catch?” He repeated and he himself had no idea why he would ask that question after all, Eijun was someone who was getting stronger very quickly. But now…he seemed like a lost puppy that went away from home for the first time.

“Sure,” Eijun grinned, Furuya instantly realizing that his own motivation suddenly rose.

~

Eijun grinned as he held a baseball glove in his right hand. “Okay, Furuya,” he slammed fist in. “Give me your best shot.” He called.

Furuya quietly stared at Eijun thinking if he should really give him best shot or if he should be gentle. Indeed Eijun just came from hospital and he certainly didn’t want to be a reason that Eijun ended there again. He closely observed his classmate before he took a step back and threw ball into Eijun’s glove rather stronger than he intended. But what made him frown was Eijun’s expression. It was grim.

“Are you taking me seriously?” he asked, his expression not readable and it made Furuya nervously meddle on his spot.

What is he supposed to say? “I don’t want to pitch with my full strength because you might end in hospital again if you miss?” Definitely not.

“I am holding back because you are still weak?” Yeah, no. He doesn’t have a death wish.

Furuya opened his mouth before he closed it again. But then again since when did even think about Eijun’s condition? Indeed he just came from hospital, missing his one month of classes and training, but since when did Furuya get soft on him? On his **rival**? “I was just warming up.” He said and raised his glove, catching the ball before looking at Eijun once again.

Eijun quietly stared at Furuya before he grinned. “Good,” he said and unconsciously took one leg behind, positioning himself. “Now give me your best pitch.” He repeated with the same grin.

Furuya quietly stared at Eijun, looking over at his position. He knew the consequences if Eijun misses the ball, but he was expecting his best pitch. There was no way Furuya would say no. And suddenly he found himself remembering the first time he met Eijun and the first time he gave him his best pitch. He remembered how surprised he looked in the same way he was now as he held the ball in the glove.

“This one is even better than the one I remember…” Furuya heard Eijun murmur and it confused him. Eijun’s smile was wide as he threw ball back to Furuya. “Do it again,” he said.

Furuya was startled. “Again?” he repeated.

“Yeah,” Eijun nodded. “What? Didn’t you see I caught it?” he asked, his smile not wavering for a second.

Eijun was right, Furuya knew. He still hesitated for a reason unknown and before he could pitch again their heads snapped to the side when they saw Oota walking towards them, his expression telling both they were in trouble. Without thinking, Eijun ran to Furuya, grabbed his hand and ran away, Oota calling after them.

They stopped behind gym, near baseball grounds, both of them trying to catch their breath. Eijun was leaning on his knees as Furuya straightened up and looked at him. He quietly stared at his classmate. “Why did you grab my hand?” Furuya asked, confusion seen in his eyes.

Eijun raised his head and looked at Furuya. “What do you mean why?” he frowned. “If we stayed there we would be in trouble, no?” he said.

Furuya didn’t know what to say. Eijun was right, again, and he hated that fact. Saying nothing, he turned away, making Eijun frown.

“W-what? Did I do something wrong?” he asked confused. Trying to lighten up the mood, he smiled, asking. “Want to continue?” He raised his hand in which he was holding the glove, but Furuya ignored him. Eijun frowned, not knowing what to do.

Furuya looked at him from the side, expecting him to start pestering him to catch with him, but he widened his eyes when he saw him turning away. Why doesn’t he say anything? Doesn’t he want to catch more?

“Sorry for…troubling you…” Eijun looked back at Furuya with a small smile the same moment Furuya looked away once again. “On the other hand, I just remembered I have a check-up in hospital either way.” He said and looked on the ground A that was now in front of him. “Since there are no classes after PE, I will just grab my bag and go.” He took off the glove and turned towards gym.

Furuya quietly stared after his classmate and he wanted to stop him. He wanted to, so why couldn’t he just open his mouth and call his name? That was all it would take him.

Eijun was sitting on a chair in waiting room in hospital. He was fidgeting, nervous for a reason unknown as he kept looking around. He bit his lower lip, his fingers crossed as he now rocked forward, seeing people passing by, before he leaned back, watching in the same way.

“Sawamura-kun,” He startled when he heard nurse’s voice calling him.

He jumped off the chair and followed the nurse into another room being oblivious to a pair of eyes that spotted him second before he disappeared behind doors. He sat on bed as doctor quietly read his file in front of him. He quietly looked around the room before he looked at doctor, who stood up.

“Well then,” Doctor Nawaki smiled as he approached Eijun. “How are you feeling today, Sawamura-kun?” he asked and stood in front of him. “Any headaches, pain in general or anything unusual?”

Eijun blinked few times before he shook with head. “No,” he spoke. “I…” He looked to the ground, not sure if he should say that he was secretly pitching.

“Yes?” Doctor raised an eyebrow, urging the brunette to continue.

“U-uh…” Eijun murmured before he nervously laughed. “It is nothing…” he scratched his head. “I was just thinking something.” He said and looked to the side, avoiding doctor’s gaze that made him even nervous even more.

Doctor Nawaki quietly stared at Eijun before he let out a sigh. “You are playing baseball, aren’t you?” he asked, making Eijun’s eyes wide as he snapped his head at him. “Your mother warned me specifically that you will probably play despite being forbidden for few months.” He said and looked at Eijun with strictness in his gaze. “If you were going to train you should have told me and I would talk with your coach to give you special training menu.”

Eijun’s eyes widened. “You would do that?” he asked, his lips turning up in a smile.

“If you don’t play for one month, I will.” He said and observed Eijun, who was thinking. “Though it may seem a lot to you, you still need to heal perfectly. You were hit in the head and putting pressure on you right away will only worsen your situation. You don’t want to come back to hospital, do you?” Doctor raised an eyebrow.

Eijun felt himself shaking his head.

Doctor smiled. “Good,” he nodded in satisfaction. “Now, is there anything else I should know?” he asked.


	6. Chapter 6

Eijun was sitting in his dorm room, by table, when he heard doors opening. He didn’t turn around since he thought it was Kuramochi, but when he wasn’t met with his usual greeting, he stopped writing and turned to look who it was. He was met with a teenager, wearing glasses, who was uncomfortably standing on the doorway.

“Can…I help you?” Eijun spoke carefully.

“A-ah…” The teen murmured and walked inside, closing the doors behind. “I just…” He tightened the grip on his bag as he looked around the room before his eyes fell on the occupied bunk. “A-are those your things?” he asked before mentally slapping himself.

“Y-yeah…” Eijun nodded before his eyes widened, remembering seeing another name before his when he came from hospital. “You are Asada, right?” he stood up, his hair messy.

“Y-yeah…” Asada nodded and startled when Eijun snapped his head towards bunk.

“Did I take your bed?” he asked and looked back at Asada, who quietly nodded. “I knew Kuramochi-senpai looked smug when he told me this was my bed.” Eijun groaned and rushed to the bunk, quickly taking his things off before throwing them on the bed above. “Sorry for that, Asada.” He flashed a smile to Asada, who watched his senpai in confusion.

“I-it is okay…” Asada murmured as he walked to his closet and opened it.

“Here,” Eijun murmured as he stared at the made bed that was, till few seconds ago, his. He turned to Asada, who was quietly taking his clothes out from the bed. He observed him for a moment before he sat back on the chair to continue his homework.

Asada looked at Eijun from the side, surprised that he didn’t ask him to go with him like he usually did. But then he remembered the game and he instantly looked back in front and quickly put his clothes in. Straightening up, he put his bag into the closet as well before he took the baseball uniform out.

“Yosh” Eijun claimed. Asada jumped on the spot before he looked at his roommate, who was now holding a textbook above his head like he just saw a miracle. “One more homework and then I am done.”

Asada could see a grin on Eijun’s lips and he unconsciously smiled as well and before he realized it, he called for him. “Senpai,” His eyes widened and put hand on his mouth as Eijun looked at him.

“Yeah?” He murmured before he looked at open closet. “Ah! Did I take your closet too?” he was already on his feet, when Asada shook with head. “No?” he murmured confused.

Asada nervously stood on his feet and fidgeted on the spot. “D-do you…” he stammered. “D-do you want to…play catch?” he asked and looked at Eijun.

Eijun quietly stared at Asada before his eyes widened. He looked away, scratching his head as he thought for a moment. “S-sorry…” He murmured and smiled apologetically. “Doctor told me I can’t play for a while. A-and I need to do h-homework…” His gaze faltered.

Asada looked to the ground in disappointment. “I-it is okay…” he murmured. “I understand… I hope you can play soon again.” His lips turned up in a smile as he looked at Eijun. “Would you like to come to watch though? The practice…” he said.

“E-eh?” Eijun was caught by surprise once again. “U-uh, maybe later. When I end with…homework.” This time he genuinely smiled.

Asada’s smile widened. “Okay,” he nodded before he quickly went towards his bed and started changing.

Eijun walked back to table and sat down to continue his homework. He was engrossed in it that he didn’t hear when Asada left before a text message woke him from his thoughts on the problem that was giving him a slight headache. He looked at his phone and slightly widened his eyes when he saw from who the message came from. His lips unconsciously turned up in a grin as he opened the message.

Feeling the grin widening, he quickly replied before putting phone back to the side. And just like the message was a cure, he solved the problem in few minutes before closing the textbook. He stood up just in time his phone started ringing. He looked at the caller, his grin coming back, before he picked it up.

“ _Eijun_ ,” A male voice called on the other side.

“You really shouldn’t send that message next time. What if my roommate sees it? He will never let me go.” Eijun laughed.

“ _Sorry for that,_ ” The teen replied with a laugh. “ _I just want to know if you are still sure about it._ ” He said.

“Sure?” Eijun frowned. “Sure about what?” he asked, slight confusion visible on his face.

“ _Huh? Don’t you remember?_ ” He asked. “ _We talked last month, before your game for your next holidays._ ” He said and continued. “ _Do you still want to come to Miyagi?_ ”

“Eh?” Eijun murmured. “We talked about that?” he was confused even more and slightly upset that he couldn’t remember. “And of course I will come. I wouldn’t miss that for anything. I probably promised either way…” He added and smiled when he heard the teen on the other side sigh from relief.

“ _Oh good,_ ” he murmured. “ _But I must warn you about Hinata. He is as lively as you are if not more._ ” He laughed. “ _And of course there is also Kageyama, with whom he always ends in a fight. But when they are playing, they trust each other completely._ ”

Eijun quietly smiled. “Your team sounds interesting.” He grinned before he looked towards doors, hearing distant calls of baseball team. “Well, I am going now. I promised Asada I will come watch the practice at least.” He said as he started walking towards doors.

“ _Ah, of course._ ” he replied. “ _Well then. I better be going now too or Suga will start talking how I keep using my phone when I honestly said no phones during practice._ ” And not a moment has passed that Eijun heard in a distance: “ _You said no phones during practice and here I see you on a phone. Be a responsible captain, Daichi._ ”

Eijun laughed and shook with head as Daichi let out a sigh. “See you, Daichi.” He said and hanged up after Daichi replied with: “ _See you,_ ”

Looking around the room once more, Eijun threw his phone on his bed above Asada’s before he left. He looked around, slowly getting more and more familiar with the dorms before he reached baseball ground where they had a practice. Everyone was busy playing or practicing in the bullpen. He spotted Asada running along with the rest of second strings before his gaze fell on Miyuki, who caught the ball and threw it to Kuramochi.

_“Miyuki” Eijun’s eyes widened when he saw Miyuki on the ground as he slowly leaned up, his gaze focused on the opponent, who was also on the ground and stared at him in surprise and confusion. The brunette could see the look in his captain’s eyes and it made him shudder as coach ran to him, followed by Eijun and the rest of the team._

“Sawamura,” Eijun turned his head to the side, seeing Rei.

“Takashima-san,” Eijun greeted.

“What are you doing here?” She approached him with a small smile on her lips.

Eijun looked back in front at the ground. “Asada asked me if I wanted to come.” He answered before his eyes fell on Miyuki once again.

Rei nodded in understanding before she looked in front as well, her arms crossed over her chest. They quietly stood by the fence before Eijun started feeling restless. He leaned from one leg to another, growing impatient as he kept watching the ball fly from one side to the other. Rei looked at him in slight confusion before she smiled as he was so obvious.

“Do you want to play?” She asked.

Eijun’s head snapped her way, his eyes wide. He unconsciously made a fist and gritted his teeth before opening his mouth only to close it seconds later. He looked to the ground, turning back in front. “I want to. But doctor told me to rest.” He raised his head and looked on the ground again, his lips forming a small smile. “I will just cheer from the side for a while.”

“If that is what you wish.” Rei replied and looked to the ground as well.

Silence was present once again, but this time it was somehow calm. For some reason Eijun felt himself relaxing—he didn’t even realize he was tense. He watched the team practice, his eyes focusing on each player every time. Kuramochi was laughing, his usual laughter heard even from the other side of the grounds, before he threw ball to Haruichi. His gaze soon fell on Kawakami and Furuya, who were standing in bullpen, pitching to two catchers that Eijun didn’t remember.

He held on the fence and gripped the hold. How much he wanted to play, yet he couldn’t. He knew the doctor will know one way or another that he was playing and he honestly didn’t want to risk anything. He wanted to get better first before going back on the field. Yet there was still one thing that bothered him…

“Takashima-san,” Eijun called, his eyes once again fixed on the catcher, who was grinning at pissed off shortstop. “Did Miyuki-senpai have an accident?” He asked and looked at the teacher and scout, whose eyes widened.

~

The cafeteria, where baseball team had their breakfast and dinner, was slowly getting fuller as the team members walked in every minute. Eijun was quietly observing them, leaning on her arms, his eyes feeling heavier than usually. A quiet sigh escaped his lips as he looked at the half empty tray in front of him before a seat on his right was occupied with the one at the left.

“Sorry it took long,” Eijun turned his head and grinned in reply at his pink haired schoolmate. “Miyuki-senpai held us back longer than intended.” Haruichi said before adding: “And as usually Furuya wanted to pitch to him.” He smiled at his black haired teammate, who was unsatisfied.

Eijun turned his head to Furuya, slightly frowning. “You need to take care of yourself too, Furuya.” He spoke and straightened up. “If you don’t, you might end in a hospital or with injury.” He said and could see him freeze for a moment before he avoided his gaze and looked away.

“ _Sorry…_ ” He murmured quietly.

Eijun looked at Haruichi and saw him frozen, staring at Furuya, before he looked back at Furuya. A memory with Kuramochi played in his head.

_“Why did you apologize in hospital?” Eijun stared at Kuramochi, whose eyes were wide as he stared at him in shock and surprise._

_“… What are you saying?” He spluttered out after a moment of silence. “Did you hit your head or what?” Kuramochi winced at his own question and looked away._

_“I didn’t.” Eijun answered, oblivious to the look in his roommate’s eyes. “Why did you apologize?” he asked once again._

_“I didn’t,” He replied and took one controller, sitting in front of the television. “What are we going to play?” He asked, trying to change the topic. But to no avail._

_“Senpai,” Eijun called with slightly raised voice and before he realized what happened, all he could see was Kuramochi’s pain and guilt in his eyes. With a startle, he backed away, unknowing that he shivered._

_“Don’t ask me that **ever** again.” He gritted his teeth. “If I say I didn’t apologize, I didn’t and that is it.” He took the second controller and smiled, the unknowing hard and cold tension instantly disappearing. “What are we going to play? You can choose whatever you want to.” He said, giving it to Eijun, who quietly took it._

“—jun? Eijun?”

Eijun blinked few times and looked at Haruichi, who was looking at him in worry.

“Are you okay?” He asked and glanced at Furuya on Eijun’s left side.

“Y-yeah…” Eijun nodded. “I am fine. Just remembered that I have a check-up next week.” He forced a smile and they both knew, but said nothing.

“A-ah, do you mind if we…sit here?” A male voice startled the three second years. Eijun raised his head and saw Asada along with a blonde haired and a dark haired teen wearing glasses. “Or…are we interrupting?” He murmured and looked from one to another.

“It is okay,” Eijun grinned and pulled his tray closer so Asada could put his on table. “Sit, sit, you are welcomed any time.” He said and looked at the other two first years that quietly sat down. “You two are probably Okumura Koushuu and Seto Takuma,” Eijun continued with a grin.

Seto laughed in reply which only made Eijun’s grin wider. “Are you going to start practicing soon, senpai?” He asked, ignoring the startles of Haruichi, Furuya and Asada.

Eijun shrugged and leaned back on his chair. “I will see next week.” He said and looked at the clock that was hanging on the wall. “Shoot, I have to go.” He jumped off his seat, startling them. “He is going to kill me for being so late.” He grabbed his plate and ran down the cafeteria.

“Sawamura don’t run!” Maezono yelled after him, Kuramochi right behind: “You still need to eat the rest!”

All that came from Eijun was: “Sorry senpai, but I am in a hurry!” as he disappeared from everyone’s wondering gazes.

Kuramochi laughed at Maezono’s expression before they sat down at their table, where the rest of the team was already sitting. Haruichi didn’t need to voice his thoughts when he saw Furuya staring at the doors. And neither did he need to ask anyone else of the first string, knowing that they all thought the same.

“He really is the same Eijun we all know.” Haruichi smiled and started eating his dinner.

Eijun unknowingly grinned to himself as he continued running down the hallway, an upperclassman calling after him to slow down. Yet he didn’t listen; all he did was apologize and continued his way before he reached his dorm room. He quickly changed into sports clothes, grabbed his bag along with phone and keys and left. Despite slowing down—so his therapist wouldn’t tell his doctor—he still walked fast enough.

Reaching his destination and walking through doors into one of training rooms, he recognized a teen, who was lifting a weight with his right hand. He could see he was troubling before he realized that he was the one that left when he reached the baseball grounds.

_“But, as long as a single strand of hope remains…he will never give up on baseball.”_

Eijun recognized Rei’s voice in his head before he backed away, his back colliding with wall, Miyuki’s face in front of him.

_“If he doesn’t want to play, he should just get out.”_

_“After that game, your strong ambition to rise up to first string is crystal clear to us second and third years. But I cannot forgive the words you just said.”_

The doors in front of him were long closed and without a second thought he ran away. It scared him. Seeing Chris trying his best at getting better and Miyuki’s expression that he has never seen after he came back, scared him. He kneeled on the ground and held for his head, his eyes shut.

“What happened?” He murmured to himself and narrowed his eyebrows not realizing he started hitting his head. “Why can’t I remember anything? Why did I lose memories of high school? I want to remember…” His voice cracked and pulled on his hair, memories that he got repeating over and over in his head like a video tape. And just like that, his head snapped up, his brown eyes looking in front like nothing happened.

He looked around, confusion slowly making its way on his face. “Huh?” he murmured and stood on his feet. “Where am I?” He looked around once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I'll be honest. I was actually going for a happy chapter, buuut I failed as you can see. Unless you want to put this in happy chapters I am not stopping you. And finally Daichi made an introduction. If I'm honest, he should be coming in at around 7th or 8th chapter unti I decided to go by normal pace so yep. Will be a bit longer to actually Karasuno come completely in, but they will since I already have a lot chapters written...


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry you had to wait even longer for this chapter, but I had a writing's block with the last chapter and just.. it's hard to write sometimes.  
> Also, this chapter is longer because I put two chapters together. The reason is already mentioned in the notes ät the end, but will just here as well. I have reached the chapter where I decided to add some scenes, so from now on the chapters are already written. I am babbling things I don't even know /keeps hitting head into wall/  
> More notes at the end of the chapter.

“Sawamura?” Eijun startled when he walked into dark room.

He turned around and sheepishly smiled. “Senpai,” He greeted Kuramochi, who was looking at him in surprise.

“Why are you back so early?” he asked and before Eijun could reply, he was standing by his side, worry seen in his eyes. “Are you alright?” he touched his arm.

“U-uh…” Eijun stammered, thinking of coming up with a lie, but just with one look he gave up. “W-where was I supposed to be, Senpai?” He saw with corner of his eye that Asada was also awake and now looking at him in worry. “I was… in front of rehabilitation centre, but I don’t know why…” He shamelessly admitted and looked away.

He felt Kuramochi’s eyes fixed on him and despite wanting to see his expression, he couldn’t make himself to raise his head and look at him. He was afraid for a reason unknown. Was it because he would find disbelieve in his eyes? Or was it because he didn’t want him to see fear in his eyes?

“Sawamura,” Kuramochi called and held him for shoulders, his eyes searching for Eijun’s. “Look at me…” His voice was quiet and Eijun succumbed without hesitation. He raised his head and looked at him. “What is the last thing you remember?” he asked.

A shiver ran down his spine and before he realized it he was shaking his head. An image of Miyuki flashed in front if his eyes and he unconsciously took a step backwards. His breathing hitched and he felt himself shaking, but didn’t know from what. The last thing he heard was Kuramochi telling Asada to get Rei before he found himself in a corner, trying to hide from the said teacher.

“Sawamura-kun,” She called him quietly and reached out her hand, to touch his shoulder, but retracted when she saw him flinch. “What is wrong? Did someone hurt you?” She asked and watched him with her eyes for any sign that could tell her the answer.

Just when she was about to give up, he spoke in a whisper. M-Miyuki…senpai…”

~

“Let me in, Kuramochi.”

Eijun woke up to Miyuki’s voice outside the dorm room.

“I am not letting you in, Miyuki. Not when Sawamura is sleeping.” Kuramochi replied. “And especially not when he said you hurt him.” His voice was strong and it told Eijun that he won’t let Miyuki in by any means.

“Why the hell did he say that? When did I hurt him?” Miyuki was irritated because he had no idea what he did to gain a cold shoulder from the southpaw pitcher.

“I don’t know when, he didn’t say, and neither do I mind, but you should know best than to hurt someone who is already injured.” Kuramochi didn’t back down. “Now go back to your room before I drag you and make you stay there.” He bit and Eijun could hear grumbling before footsteps of someone retreating. A minute later the doors opened, revealing Kuramochi sighing.

“Senpai…” He called quietly.

Kuramochi raised his head and smiled. “Yo,” He greeted. “Did you sleep well?” he asked and walked to his bunk side. “Feeling alright?”

Eijun quietly nodded. “A-and Miyuki-senpai?” He asked quietly.

“He just came to ask me about class, nothing else.” Kuramochi lied. “Rest some more. Coach told me to keep an eye on you for this weekend.” He grinned with the mischievous smile that promised unbearable pain if he doesn’t do as he says.

Eijun nervously smiled and laid back down. He really didn’t want to even think what kind of pain that smile could bring. He stared into the ceiling and frowned as he wanted to remember what happened the night before.

“Oh right,” Kuramochi turned on his chair and looked at Eijun. “Rei will take you to the doctor just in case, during the practice.” He said before continuing doing homework after getting a small nod.

_Why can’t I remember anything? Why did I lose memories of high school? I want to remember…_

Eijun frowned at the voice inside his head. He knew it was his, but he wondered if he said it to someone or did he say it to himself? There were so many questions running in his head and it made him scared. But he knew if he showed these fears, his friends and family would be worries even more. And he didn’t want that. He didn’t want to see them following his every move like he was about to break. He didn’t want to see his mother stay by his side and disregard anyone else. He wanted to be the same Sawamura Eijun he was.

But how was he supposed to be, when he had no memories of his high school?

Sitting in doctor’s office beside Rei was nerve wracking for Eijun. The check-up was normal as always. Checking his breathing, doing an RTG for his head and asking him questions. It was like every other check-up.

“I heard from Takashima-san about the incident last night.” Doctor spoke and looked at Eijun, who shrunk, trying to hide. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked in a soothing voice that calmed his raging heartbeat.

Eijun looked at Rei and saw her smile and he knew no one else will know aside from the two and the coach. Gulping, he looked at his hands before he opened his mouth. “I… Yesterday, I only remember till dinner. But then I found myself in front of rehabilitation and I…I don’t know why I was there and neither can I remember how I got there…” He admitted. “I only remember words ‘Why can’t I remember anything? Why did I lose memories of high school? I want to remember…’ and nothing else.” He looked at doctor, who was frowning.

“You were supposed to have a therapy last evening.” Doctor spoke. “Is there anything you remember from it? When you were at the centre?” he asked.

“I…I don’t know…” Eijun shrugged and looked to the floor. “I think I heard M-Miyuki-senpai, but I don’t know. Everything is so blurry…” He said and made a fist.

“It is alright,” Doctor smiled. “The only reason I can come up with as to why you can’t remember is that you tried to remember something which backfired at you with the memory loss of what happened after dinner.” Rei frowned as Eijun bit his lower lip. “I advise you to try not to think too much about memories. They will come back in time and I know it is frustrating for you, but if you try to remember by forcing yourself, it can backfire much worse than the first time.”

“Then what would be the best to do now?” Rei asked. “There is a high possibility he won’t listen…”

Eijun’s cheeks turned red and it made doctor laugh. “I think the best is for him to take some time away from baseball and high school.” He answered and turned to his desk. “A vacation, away from his current school, is what I have in mind. For a month or maybe two, or at least until he feels alright again. Which of course could end that he will have to repeat second year.”

Eijun’s eyes widened. “What? No,” He startled at how loud his voice was. The two looked at him in surprise. “I-I mean… I-is there no other way? Like, doing exams from home or something?” he looked at Rei, who smiled.

“You can do it this way as well,” Doctor spoke after a moment. “But of course if school has the program for this. Or you can only go to school when there are exams and study at home. There are different types of doing things from home and it mostly depends if school has the solution.”

“I think coach can talk with Principal about it.” Rei answered with a smile.

Eijun smiled widely, before it turned into a frown. And there it was again… Fear of the unknown.

“Of course,” Doctor continued, waking Eijun from his thoughts. “If there are any problems at all, don’t hesitate to come to hospital. Especially if the headaches are frequent.” He looked into his eyes, waiting for the pitcher to nod. After getting an answer he wanted, he added: “Now, I need to talk with Takashima-san about one more thing. Could you wait outside?” He smiled.

Eijun quietly nodded as he stood up and left the office. He sat on the chair in front of office and looked around, seeing children and people around. Nurses were calling them inside and he tilted head to the side, quietly observing them. Some children had casts on their limbs, some were beside their parents as they waited to be called while some were quietly sitting and waiting as he was.

“Sawamura?” A familiar voice woke him from his observing.

He raised his head and looked to the side. “Chris…senpai?” He was surprised seeing him.

Chris smiled and approached him. “Are you here with Takashima-san?” He asked and sat beside him on the chair.

“U-uh, yeah…” Eijun nodded, feeling a bit uncomfortable. “W-what about you?” he asked.

“I had a check-up as well.” He replied, his eyes quietly observing Eijun. “Were you at rehabilitation centre last night?” he asked.

“E-eh?” Eijun was caught off guard. “W-why are you asking?” he asked.

“I thought I saw you by doors, nut it must have been just my imagination.” Chris smiled and looked in front.

“I wasn’t…” Eijun heard himself speak before he realized what he wanted to say. Chris only gave a nod and a smile in understanding as he stood up. “Are you..leaving?” he asked.

“Yes, I am starting with therapy in few minutes.” He said and looked at him once again. “Hope you will get better soon.” He added and with a short wave left the second year.

Eijun quietly watched him disappear down the hallway. He narrowed his eyebrows, a memory of Chris lifting weight with his right hand. With a frown, he shook with head and looked back in front, Rei’s voice heard in his head. _“But, as long as a single strand of hope remains…he will never give up on baseball.”_

And before anyone knew and realized it, a month has passed.

Kataoka’s eyes were wide alongside Ochiai’s, Oota’s and Rei’s. Though he did expect Sawamura to approach him, he still wanted to give him few months, not two weeks.

The brunet was quietly standing in the office, his eyes looking everywhere around except in front and made a mental note to approach coach when he was surely alone. He fidgeted in his place and bit his lower lip, becoming nervous by each silent minute. He didn’t know what to do, less alone what to say. Was it really okay for him to say that?

“Are you sure?” Kataoka spoke, breaking the deafening silence. His voice was calm and quiet that told Eijun even if he lied he will be excused.

“Y-yes,” The latter nodded. “I-I don’t think I deserve to be with…them…right now…” he averted his gaze to the ground once again.

“You do realize that there is a chance you might not—”

“I do,” Eijun interrupted Oota. “I don’t really mind, I mean… I probably do mind, at least the previous me, but right now I don’t think I am suitable.” He looked at coach.

“As you wish,” Kataoka spoke after a moment of silence. Everyone’s eyes widened, Rei ready to interrupt him, trying to change his mind, but Kataoka quickly continued. “But I won’t tell the team. Let them think you are still with them. The number you wear still belongs to you even if you are not playing.” he said.

Eijun’s eyes slightly widened. Averting his gaze to the floor, he bowed. “Thank you for listening to me.” He said before he left the office.

“Are you sure about this?” Rei turned to Kataoka. “The moment the team learns what happened there will be some trying to get his position.” **Not to mention that Ochiai will take this opportunity. There is no doubt.** She glanced at the assistant coach.

“I know,” Kataoka replied still looking at, now closed, doors. “But if that is his wish, I can only do so much for him at the moment.” He turned around. “Sawamura Eijun has changed and there is nothing we can do. He can still pitch the same as before, but we don’t know how he plays. Is he better? Or is he worse? Or did nothing change? We don’t know that yet. And from what you told me last month, I believe it is best if he takes some time away from the baseball.”

The three teachers widened their eyes.

“There will be uproar in the first-string as well as in second-string. Sawamura will have to go through this alone and I believe that in this situation he will find who his friends are and who he was before an accident.” Kataoka stared through window onto the field where he saw first-string players practicing. He saw Eijun nearing the gates before he abruptly stopped and touched his head.

Kataoka narrowed his eyebrows before he saw Eijun falling on his knees. “Rei call ambulance.” Was everything he said before he ran out of the office.

Rei was confused and she walked towards the window with Ochiai and Oota, only to widen her eyes. “Sawamura” She called and took the phone, dialling the number for ambulance as Oota and Ochiai ran out of the office.

When Kataoka reached the gates, Eijun was still holding his head. He could hear him groaning and paced up. “Sawamura” he called and held him before he fell to the ground.

That caught Haruichi’s attention, who was the one closest to the gates. He turned his head and without hesitation called out, “Eijun” before he ran out of the field.

Hearing the familiar name being called, Kuramochi turned to see what made Haruichi panic and widened his eyes. Eijun was lying on the ground, Kataoka already by his side, Ochiai and Oota running towards them with Rei behind as she was holding her phone, talking. He didn’t mind for the ball that almost hit him, if he didn’t crunch down in a moment, as he ran after the second year.

Eijun slowly opened his eyes, touching his head as he heard nothing but ringing. He saw coach, assistant coach and club president, but he couldn't get what they were saying. It was too loud. He raised his hands and covered his ears, trying to ease the pain, but nothing helped.

“It hurts…” he groaned, his eyes shut. He could tell the coach told everyone to quiet down since the ringing, the pressure, lowered, but was still present.

“Sawamura?” he heard coach calling him.

A groan escaped his lips, telling the coach that he heard him well.

“The ambulance is here,” Kataoka spoke, which surprised the second year though all he showed was pain. “They are going to take you to hospital.”

“No” He claimed, his eyed widening, but only to hold onto his head, pain getting unbearable. “No…ho-hospital…” he managed to say.

He couldn’t hear what they were talking about and he didn’t mind. The only thing he didn’t want to, was for his parents and grandfather hearing that he ended in hospital again. He knew they would be worried and his mother wouldn’t leave his side. He hoped the coach wouldn’t let them take him to hospital. But the next thing he knew, everything went pitch black once again.

Kuramochi Youichi was unusually quiet for someone, who was always energetic. He sat on the chair in the Room 5 and stared at the unmoving body on the bed. Sawamura Eijun, his roommate, was lying in his bed. The ambulance and doctor Nawaki were against that Eijun would stay here, but at the end they agreed. How? Kuramochi didn’t know what coach Kataoka has told them that made them change their minds. But that wasn’t the case right now …

The room was quiet and dark when Eijun regained his consciousness and opened his eyes. The headache he had not too long ago was now almost gone. He still heard a bit of ringing, but it could easily be ignored.

His eyes scattered the room and realized that he was in the dorm room he shared with Kuramochi and Asada. A sigh of relief left his lips as he slowly sat up. He wondered what time it was. Was it still day, or was it night already? But he never really cared about the time.

Sitting up on his bed, Eijun held for his head, still feeling a little pain before he decided to go on fresh air. He stood from bed and looked at the bunk in front, seeing Kuramochi sleeping before he looked at Asada, who was also still sleeping. Blinking few times, Eijun squinted his eyes before he looked around the room once again, trying to remember where his clothes were.

Walking to one of the closets, he opened it and sighed in relief seeing it belonged to him. He took sweats and a shirt out before changing into them. Looking back at Kuramochi’s back, he walked to doors and out into the chilly night. It wasn’t cold during the day, but during the night, you almost had to wear long sleeves.

Quietly closing the doors behind, Eijun looked up into the sky, seeing a star here and there before deciding to take a short walk around. He didn’t look at the time when he left, but he could say it was towards the morning hours. The night on the east was slowly getting lighter and before Eijun stopped on top of the bridge, the sun coloured the sky with beautiful orange and red colours.

He stood on the bridge and watched the sun rise, his lips unknowingly turning into smile. He felt familiar with the scene in front of him, yet at the same time it felt so strange. These feelings he had at the moment were scaring him. He didn’t know where to put them. But he knew that whatever happened before at this same place and time was something that brought such happiness to him.

Walking back to the dorm, he felt a hand on his shoulder, which startled him. He jumped and turned around, seeing Haruichi and Furuya standing, now, in front of him. And for another reason he felt happy.

“Did you come out on a run?” Haruichi asked and stepped on his right side, while Furuya walked on Eijun’s left side.

“On a walk more than on a run…” Eijun scratched his head with a chuckle. “I woke up not too long ago and wanted to go out. Though I didn’t know why at first, now I realize why.” He smiled, giving one of his usual grins.

Haruichi smiled as Furuya seemed relaxed. **He is still the same.** They both thought, but deep down they knew he wasn’t anymore. He wasn’t the same – he was calmer, he didn’t call Miyuki every time to catch his pitches and took training and practice more seriously. They were happy he still loved baseball, but they wanted old Eijun back, especially Furuya. Now that Eijun lost his memories, he felt lonely with no one around to compete in baseball. It was different; it felt like he was the only one pitcher trying to fight for ace position, though Kawakami was still there. But it just didn’t feel the same.

But Eijun didn’t know any of that. The rivalry for number one – ace – spot was something he wasn’t interested in anymore. If he still was, he was hiding it really well. The two first years couldn’t know what Eijun was thinking. Despite showing his love for baseball, they knew there was something else to that as well. Not seeing him in bullpen or training with the first-string as much as before only made them think for the worse. But if Kataoka didn’t say anything for now, then there was still a chance. Still a chance that this wasn’t happening, but no one could know except Eijun himself. They only hoped that their worst thought won’t become reality.

Reaching the dorm, Eijun looked at his two classmates. “Then…see you later,” He raised his hand and just as he turned around to open the doors and walk in, Haruichi spoke.

“You aren’t leaving, right?” he asked, his voice serious.

Eijun blinked few times and looked at the pink haired teen. “Eh?” he murmured confused. “What do you mean?” he asked.

Haruichi’s eyes widened and averted his gaze to the ground in a second, mumbling under his breath. “He means about first-string.” Furuya spoke. Eijun looked at him, Haruichi’s cheeks turning into light shade of pink. “You aren’t leaving first-string, right?” he asked.

Eijun’s eyes widened at Furuya’s question, but didn’t say a word. In fact he didn’t know what to answer them. For some reason he felt sad for hiding it from them, but for some reason he wanted to tell them. He wanted to tell them that he doesn’t feel like he belongs to the first-string; at least not now, when he doesn’t even remember any of them, despite parts of his memory flashing in front of his eyes every now and then.

Haruichi raised his head, when Eijun didn’t answer. “You…” he murmured, realization hitting him.

“I…” Eijun didn’t know what to say. “I have to prepare for class…” He stammered out and disappeared into his room without looking back at either of them.

Haruichi and Furuya quietly stared after him in shock and surprise. Was he really leaving the first-string? What about him trying to fight for ace spot with Furuya? What about cheering for Haruichi whenever he hit a successful ball? That really won’t happen anymore? The two first-string players lowered their gazes to the ground and left the hall, back to their own rooms.

Inside the Room 5, Eijun was leaning against the doors as he stared to the ground. He knew that he won’t be able to avoid them anymore. And he didn’t know how to approach each one of the from now on. Hearing noise coming from in front, Eijun raised his head and looked at Kuramochi, who sat up, still half asleep.

“Oh, Sawamura…” Kuramochi murmured before his eyes widened. “You idiot, did you go out?” He jumped off the bunk and walked over to the brunet, Eijun instantly crunching down, lowering his head. “Doctor said—” Before he could continue, he saw Eijun’s shoulders shivering. “Sawamura?” he called in worry. “Are you okay?” he put hand on his shoulder, worry seen in his eyes.

“S-senpai…” He stuttered sobbing and raised his head, his eyes at the edge of letting tears down. “Why does it hurt?” His voice cracked.

“Where does it hurt?” Panic was now visible in his eyes.

Eijun slowly raised his hand and put it on his chest, Kuramochi’s eyes slightly widening. “I don’t want to leave the first-string…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have two news. A good one and a sad one.  
> Good one is, I have reached the normal pace for the fanfiction, which means, from now I am going to update chapters that are already written!  
> Sad one is, starting next week, I have to start preparing for exams that I have in June and July. Which means there might be or might not be any updates. I know it might sound unfair, but it will mostly depend on my physical well-being. Even though I have chapters written, I might not be able to update because I get...mood swings and sometimes very depressed during exam time, so I hope you will understand.


	8. Chapter 8

Kuramochi was sitting in the dining room, his breakfast forgotten on the tray in front of him. He didn’t hear people calling his name, his mind full of nothing but Eijun and his words, “ _I don’t want to leave the first-string,_ ”

“Oi Kuramochi,” Miyuki shoved the vice-captain into shoulder, managing to wake him from his thoughts. “What is up with you today?” he asked and looked around, seeing only Furuya and Haruichi. “Where is Sawamura?” he asked looked back at Kuramochi. “I need to tell him to take practice seriously and not to screw around…”

Kuramochi looked at two second years, who were sitting not far from his table. They weren’t eating and the olive-haired teen could imagine why not. He couldn’t blame them either. Turning to Miyuki, he spoke. “He is resting…”

Miyuki narrowed his eyebrows at the coldness in his voice and immediately became alarmed. “What happened?” he asked.

Kuramochi hesitated before he answered, “Nothing,” quietly and looked away.

“Kuramochi,” Miyuki called with stern voice, but the later didn’t reply or look his way. “Kuramochi” He raised his voice, gaining attention from other students.

But he was stubborn. He didn’t want to say anything that Eijun doesn’t want for anyone to know. He gritted his teeth and stood up, ready to leave, but Miyuki grabbed him for wrist. Kuramochi’s eyes fell on his classmate in a glare. “Let go.” He spoke coldly.

“Tell me what happened.” Miyuki ignored Kuramochi’s sentence.

“Let go, Miyuki.” He warned and made a fist, but before Miyuki could reply, his eyes widened when he felt Kuramochi’s fist colliding with his chin.

“Kuramochi,” Kawakami called wide eyed, many first-string players running to them, holding Kuramochi and helping Miyuki off the ground.

“Miyuki are you okay?” Maezono asked, looking at the captain.

“What the hell, Kuramochi?” Miyuki ignored Maezono and touched his chin. “Why did you hit me?” He asked.

“Don’t act like you don’t know.” Kuramochi claimed, glaring at the dark haired brunet. “You knew this would happen sooner or later, but you did nothing.” He took a step forward, Ono doing the same in case he hits Miyuki again. “What kind of captain are you?”

“What are you talking about?” Miyuki was confused.

“You know exactly what I am talking about.” Kuramochi spat. “Sawamura left the first-string right when we took our eyes off him.” The whole cafeteria was quiet, Miyuki’s eyes wide. “I don’t know what kind of deal he has with teachers, but the reason we don’t see him much is because he is back in second-string.”

“W-what are you saying?” Miyuki murmured. “Don’t joke around, Kuramochi.” His surprised gaze turned into glare.

“Why do you think we don’t see him with us anymore and why do you think he is avoiding us whenever we call for him?” Kuramochi raised his voice, Ono and Kawakami losing their hold on him. “Sawamura isn’t in the first-string anymore.”

-:-

Kataoka could see the tension in the first-string. **So they know …** He thought to himself and looked around the field. **Furuya and Haruichi aren’t himself and neither is Kuramochi.** A quiet sigh escaped his lips. **Kawakami’s pitches are slowly going back, but with the way things are … Sawamura did have an effect on him two years ago.**

“Coach,” Rei called. She also noticed the sudden change. Second-string was getting warmer to take the free spot and first-string was angry. “Should we do anything?” She asked looking at the first-string.

“There is nothing we can do.” Kataoka spoke and glanced at Ochiai. “Even he can feel and see the change they are going through. Sooner or later he will realize that Sawamura is needed for this team.” He said in quiet voice, but it made Rei curious.

**Ochiai? Impossible …** She shook with head.

“Sawamura” Everyone’s attention was on Miyuki, who angrily walked towards the startled second year.

“Miyuki,” Kuramochi called, knowing that when Miyuki gets angry he knows no mercy with words. But Miyuki was already standing in front of Eijun. “Don’t you even dare.” Kuramochi pointed at him, walking his way, but Miyuki ignored him.

“What makes you think you can leave the first-string just like that?” Miyuki being angry was understatement. He was pissed.

Eijun’s eyes widened. What he feared the most became his living nightmare. “I—”

“As your captain, I forbid you to leave the team.” Miyuki interrupted the pitcher, making his eyes wide. “And if anyone has a problem with you still being in the first-string than it has to do with me as well. You are not allowed to leave the team. If assistant coach, coach or anyone else have anything against it then I am leaving the first-string as well.”

Gritting his teeth, Eijun felt annoyed for some reason. “What makes you think you can decide instead of me?” he asked, anger clearly shown in his eyes. “The previous me might know you, but I **don’t**.” he emphasized the last word. Miyuki seemed taken aback. “And don’t you even dare to decide instead of me. So what if I left the first-string? I did it because I feel like I don’t belong here even though the previous me was in. I don’t know **any** of you, but there are these feelings I don’t know anything about and that pisses me off so much.” He was breathing rapidly while staring right at Miyuki.

Everyone was observing the two, not knowing if they should interrupt them or just leave them be. With a sigh, Kuramochi walked to Eijun’s side and put hand on his shoulder, startling him. “It is okay,” He spoke and looked at Miyuki. “Captain is just stressed because of the incoming games. He didn’t mean to say anything that would anger you.” He looked at Eijun and smiled.

Eijun calmed down and looked to the ground. “I am sorry…” he murmured.

“No…” Miyuki murmured. “It is me who should be apologizing. _Sorry_ …”

Eijun’s eyes widened as he snapped his head up and stared at Miyuki, Kuramochi narrowing his eyebrows before he also looked at Miyuki. Eijun opened his mouth to ask, but before he could, he remembered the pain Kuramochi showed when he asked him. With a frown, he narrowed his eyebrows and looked to the ground once again, completely ignoring Miyuki’s words. Seeing the confusion and hurt in his eyes, Kuramochi looked at Miyuki, who stared at Eijun in confusion.

**Why doesn’t anyone want to tell me why they apologized?** Eijun thought to himself. Making a fist, he gritted his teeth before he ran away. He heard Kuramochi calling after him, but he didn’t stop. He felt so familiar with everyone, yet so distant as well.

He didn’t watch where he was running, he just ran until he bumped into someone. Hearing a groan, he looked at the person he hit in accident. He had lighter shade of brown hair and eyes filled with love he couldn’t get which. “I-I am sorry…” He stuttered.

“Sawamura…” The teen looked at Eijun in surprise.

Eijun blinked few times before his eyes widened.

_“Destroying the fighting spirit of an opponent with a single overawing pitch – that is the difference between you and Furuya. Haven’t I said it before? It is impossible for you to become Seidou’s ace pitcher as long as Furuya is on the team.”_

It was clear in his head that this person’s voice just spoke in his head, memory of a game playing.

_“Given up on the first string… Although you are an idiot, you hit the mark. So don’t become like me…Sawamura…”_

His voice was clear. Eijun blinked few times before he looked at the teen in front, who was looking at him in worry. He took a step backwards, feeling afraid. Why was he suddenly afraid of him? He saw him few times after he came back and even talked to him, but now he felt afraid, sad and confused.

“I am sorry…” he stammered.

“It is okay,” The teen spoke and reached out his hand to put it on Eijun’s shoulder, but he flinched away like he just got burnt. “Sawamura?” he called in confusion.

“I…I…” He didn’t know what to say. Without thinking he ran away once again. Memory of the teen kept repeating in his head, showing him the lifeless eyes he once had and the way Miyuki approached him. He couldn’t remember what they talked about, but he was afraid. He was afraid of the look Miyuki gave him.

Reaching his room, Eijun walked to his table and took his phone. He didn’t want to be here anymore. He wanted to leave, go back to where his friends were; back to Nagano, where his parents and grandfather were.

“ _Eijun?_ ” He heard his mother picking up the phone.

“Mom…” His voice cracked as he kneeled down, with one hand holding onto table. He could hear that whatever she was doing she stopped and gave him full attention. “I want to go home…” he whispered.

There was a moment of silence on the other side, before his mother replied in soft and gentle voice: “ _I understand,_ ”

-:-

When Kuramochi walked into his room, he was met with the scene he didn’t want ever to see. There was a bag, full of clothes, Eijun sitting on the bed right beside as he stared to the ground. Kuramochi knew sooner or later this would happen and he couldn’t blame him.

Without a word he walked to Eijun’s side, but stopped when he spoke: “I am sorry for leaving you alone too…” He raised his bead and looked straight at the third year, whose eyes slightly widened.

“Do you…” He couldn’t end his question, afraid that he might just be hoping for too much.

“A bit…” Eijun admitted, his lips forming a half smile and averted his gaze back to the floor. “I…I bumped into Chris senpai and…remembered something…” he said, his half smile disappearing.

Kuramochi sat beside Eijun and looked to the ground, not saying anything. There was silence in the room, no one wanting to speak, less alone to make a movement. Indeed the third year shortstop felt sad that Eijun is leaving, but if he wanted to, why should he hold him back?

“You…still have my number, right?” Kuramochi spoke after a moment of silence. “In case something happens or you need someone…” he added quietly.

“Mm…” Eijun quietly nodded before someone knocked on doors.

Kuramochi stood up and walked to doors, already having an idea who it might be. He opened the doors and saw Mrs Sawamura standing in front of him. She slightly widened her eyes, but smiled second later. The third year shortstop returned the smile, though he himself wasn’t sure if that really was a smile, and stepped aside to let her in.

Mrs Sawamura walked into the room and looked at her son, who was still staring to the ground. A quiet sigh escaped her lips, her smile slowly disappearing as she approached her son. She didn’t say a word when she put her hand gently on Eijun’s shoulder, making him raise his head. His brown eyes widened and without a second thought embraced his mother in tight hug.

Kuramochi quietly observed their interaction before he decided to leave them alone, to give them privacy. If Eijun wanted to leave to think of what to do, then he should. He couldn’t blame the pitcher for feeling out of the place when actually they were the ones making him feel that way—trying to avoid him, trying to not meet his gaze or trying to leave whenever he asked a question. He couldn’t blame Eijun for leaving the first-string.

“Youichi-san,” Haruichi called the shortstop.

“Oh, Haruichi…” Kuramochi grinned.

“Is Eijun-kun in his room?” The pink haired teen asked. “I wanted to see if he is okay…” he murmured and lowered his gaze.

Kuramochi could see Haruichi was worried for his friend. And that was something he was happy for. Eijun still had friends and people that were worried for him when the rest of the team was trying their best to avoid him, him included. “He isn’t,” He lied. “I just checked up, but there was no one in the room. I don’t know where he disappeared to…” He scratched his head, apologetically smiling.

“Oh…” Haruichi nodded in understanding. “If you see him can you tell me?” he asked and looked at the third year.

“Of course,” Kuramochi showed his usual grin.

“Thank you,” Haruichi bowed before he turned around and walked back from where he came from.

Kuramochi quietly watched the second year walk away before he turned his head and looked at Room 5. **No one in the room…** He thought, closing his eyes and letting out a sigh. **From now on there really won’t be anyone loud and cheerful in the room except me and Asada…**


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for not updating last month. I wanted to, but my life took a huge 180-turn and I ended up being forgetting things and lose things and overthink and just...it was hectic as I was lost. I still am, but at least I know what I want to do for the next few days. I apologize again and here is new chapter. Enjoy~

“Sawamura,” Kanemaru Shinji looked at his classmate and friend, who just walked into the class in time for the lesson. Just with one look, a glance he received from him, told him something was up.

The moment Kanemaru heard Eijun ended in hospital, he worried as much as everyone else in the baseball team did even though not everyone showed it. Glancing at the empty seat for almost a month, ate him more than it should. Yet he couldn’t do anything. He paid Eijun a visit in hospital every now and then, telling him what they did even though his mother was sitting beside. And in this time he realized just how much of an effect Sawamura Eijun had on the team even if he alone knew it or not.

“K-Kanemaru…” Eijun’s lips turned up in a small smile as he walked to his table and sat down.

“How are you feeling?” Kanemaru asked and sat on the seat in front, looking at Eijun. “Is your headache better?”

Everyone in the class knew of Eijun’s condition. Some helped him with classes, homework and things where he needed help, while some haven’t changed the least. Some were indifferent towards second year pitcher and that was something Eijun respected, though he also appreciated the things his classmates did for him when he came back to school.

“Yeah,” Eijun nodded. “I feel better now.” He said and looked in front, Kanemaru standing up and going back to his seat when History teacher walked in the class. The second year pitcher could tell all teachers knew of the situation that happened not too long ago from the way he looked his way and held his gaze for few seconds before deciding to start the lesson.

Everything seemed normal. No one suspected anything, aside from Kanemaru, who kept taking glances of Eijun through the lessons. Eijun wasn't himself. His eyes were dull for some reason Kanemaru didn’t remember. Not that he didn’t want to, he couldn’t, until he remembered the second year pitcher coming into class just in time for lesson. Eijun was never late. He was either early or few minutes before the bell, but never late or right on time.

In the lunch break, where most of the students in class were gone, Eijun was still quietly sitting on his seat, his chin in the crook of his palm as his eyes stared through window. Home; he was going home. He felt happy, yet sad. Recalling a scene he remembered with Chris, he shook his head, shaking the memory out of his head.

“Oi, Sawamura,” He heard his name being called from doors.

Turning his head, he spotted Kuramochi leaning with one hand on doors as he stared right at him. “Kuramochi-senpai,” He called and stood up.

“Let’s go grab something if you haven’t eaten yet.” Kuramochi grinned.

Eijun blinked few times before he looked at Kanemaru, who was sitting on his seat, ramming through his back. “Kanemaru, Furuya,” he called, gaining his attention. “Want to grab something?” he asked.

“Huh?” Kanemaru was startled and surprised while the pitcher quietly raised his head. If Eijun asked him anything it was always about baseball, nothing else. And to hear him asking to grab a meal together with Kuramochi? That was something new to him. And for some reason he wondered. Will the rest of the team also be there?

“Sure,” He replied with a nod before standing up and leaving the class with Eijun and Furuya.

The four baseball players walked down the hallway, talking about their upcoming games, including Eijun’s state and if he looks forward to the first game he will pitch in after the incident. Eijun couldn’t tell Kanemaru and Furuya that he was leaving. The only one who knew was Kuramochi and coach and no one else. Not even Rei, Oota and Ochiai knew about Sawamura’s leave from Seido High. So he lied. He lied to Kanemaru and to everyone in the team that was sitting in the cafeteria by table.

No one suspected though they indeed were surprised when Eijun was a bit more social even though his memories still haven’t returned. Just as he didn’t tell them about his leave, he didn’t tell them about the memory that came back. They didn’t need to know. And though he felt bad and sad for keeping it from them, he put the feeling aside and enjoyed in the company. He wanted to be happy at least for a while before everything ends. He wanted to make some memories of the people he was friends with.

-:-

Standing in the empty room, Kuramochi felt the need to follow Eijun, who just left. Asada was with his classmates, working on a project. Despite his smile that was on his face just one second ago it was now replaced with nothing but sour look. There was a reason why coach Kataoka told the team there was no practice today. He knew Eijun didn’t want commotion of his leave, knowing that this time not only Miyuki would make a scene, but the rest of them as well. And Eijun didn’t want that; he didn’t want to feel even guiltier than he already does.

Without saying a word, Kuramochi turned around and ran out of the room. He saw Eijun alongside his father, walking towards the gates. There was a high chance anyone could hear or see them, especially Eijun, and he didn’t want for anyone to find out. So instead of calling he just ran and grabbed his hand, stopping him on tracks.

Eijun’s eyes widened at Kuramochi’s approach. “Kuramochi-senpai?” he called confused and surprised at the same time. Having slight idea, Eijun looked at his father. “Can you wait for me at gates?” he asked.

Mr Sawamura looked at Kuramochi and gave a firm nod with a small smile before he left them alone. Looking back at Kuramochi, Eijun saw unknown feelings in his eyes and just as he wanted to speak, the third year shortstop beat him at it: “I know you want to leave, but …” he hesitated for a moment. “Can’t you wait for a while?” he asked, his head slowly rising up.

“Wait?” Eijun repeated, tilting his head to the side.

“With leaving…” Kuramochi murmured.

Eijun blinked few times, his gaze softening. Kuramochi was startled seeing his gaze, but said nothing as be quietly hoped he will change his mind.

“Kuramochi-senpai,”

Kuramochi didn’t like the tone Eijun spoke in.

“Thank you for everything, but I am sorry. I need to go to a place and to people I am more familiar with than here.” His eyes fell on the dorm behind the shortstop. “I don’t know for how long, but I will come back.” He looked back at his roommate, his lips forming a smile. “I know I will.”

A sigh escaped Kuramochi’s lips. “Of course you will.” He messed Eijun’s hair, his lips turning up in his usual grin. “You better call me each weekend, you hear me?”

Eijun’s smile turned in a grin, something that Kuramochi missed. “Of course,” He replied and turned around, leaving through the gates. Before he completely disappeared, he stopped and turned around to look at Kuramochi once again. “Can you tell them ‘thank you’ for me?” he asked.

Kuramochi felt his throat tighten and couldn’t reply with words. He managed to nod, which gained wider smile from the second year pitcher. His eyes watched Eijun’s back as he retreated before he abruptly stopped, making Kuramochi wonder, his lips turn into another smile and a second later running somewhere.

A sigh left his lips as he turned around and walked back towards his empty room. When he walked inside he saw a letter on Eijun’s table. He walked towards it and held it, reading Eijun’s writing that obviously showed he was in a hurry. He wondered when he had time to write it. Was it few minutes ago when his father was waiting for him while he talked with Kuramochi? Or was it few days ago like he knew this would happen? But then Kuramochi remembered Eijun writing something when he came from the bath and he asked him what he was writing. He remembered Eijun jumping from surprise before he almost crumbled the paper. And that was last night.

His grip on the letter tightened, his teeth gritting as he closed his eyes. Even now as he stood in the middle of the room, his eyes fell on the doors, waiting for Eijun to burst into and tell he was being late for practice just so he could practice his new move on him. But that didn’t happen when five minutes passed and neither did when one hour passed by. He was standing alone in his room and he came to realization that he hated silence.

Kuramochi didn’t know how much time has passed, but when he walked on the baseball field, almost everyone from the first-string were practicing along with second-string. He look at Haruichi, who was batting before his eyes fell on Furuya, who was pitching in bullpen. His throat dried, feeling a lump growing, making him unable to talk. **Please don’t ask. Please don’t ask…** He quietly begged as he made his way to the batting side.

And just like luck wasn’t on his side today, he heard the captain call out for him. “Kuramochi,” Miyuki’s tone already told him the reason he is calling. And he silently swore as to why he didn’t stay back in the room.

Turning around, facing the captain, his serious expression hadn’t changed for a second. Miyuki was already used to Kuramochi’s annoyance and irritation whenever he called for him, but this time was different. Anyone could tell that third year shortstop wasn’t in mood to fool around today.

Kuramochi waited for Miyuki to continue. “We will go over a game later on. Tell everyone to meet in the club room where we always gather.” It was everything Miyuki said before he walked away to the bullpen. He didn’t wait for the vice-captain to answer or just reply him with a nod. He knew Kuramochi will do that.

And the shortstop let out the breath he was holding. For some reason he felt relieved that Miyuki didn’t ask him about Eijun. But for some reason, he knew that Miyuki already came up with a reason, because Eijun never missed practice and even when there wasn’t any he was always on the field running. Slowly, but surely, Kuramochi knew, the name _Sawamura Eijun_ and number eighteen will become a taboo between the first-string.

And before Kuramochi’s thoughts were on baseball, he wondered what kind of face Eijun was making right now. The memory that has returned, he knew about it, and it made him wonder even more if he figured it out or just let it pass by as confused and startled Eijun. He wondered as he practiced his batting by Haruichi’s side. Anyone could see that Kuramochi was thinking, which was, truthfully speaking, surprising the first-string. But they didn’t ask him questions, because they knew his temper was shorter than it was before.

Sawamura Eijun was leaning on his elbow, his brown eyes staring outside the window and up into blue sky. The ride in the car alongside with his father was quiet as the only thing that was heard was radio. And despite smiling and feeling happiness, he felt sadness and regret. He hated those feelings when he had no idea the reason behind. And he hated them even more when he couldn’t get an answer from Kuramochi whenever he asked a question. It angered him and he wanted to know, but at the same time he also hated himself for making him show expression he hated the most.

It was a three hours’ drive from Tokyo back to Nagano. Eijun never thought that three hours was a long ride, but this time, he couldn’t wait to get home and stop thinking and recalling the expressions of his teammates. He saw them, when they think he didn’t look. The pain, regret, worry and anger were clearly shown and no matter how hard he tried to keep his thoughts from it, he kept seeing them.

“Dad…” Eijun called, memory of his encounter with Chris still fresh in his head.

“Yeah?” Mr Sawamura called and glanced at his son from the side.

“Was I happy being here?”

-:-

“Daichi,” Ash-haired teen called for the dark haired teen, who was changing his shirt.

“Yeah?” The said teen turned around, smile visible on his face.

“You are unusually happy today. Did something happen?” he asked ad put hand on his waist, leaning on his left leg.

“It is nothing,” He replied, his smile turning in a grin. The ash-haired teen narrowed his eyebrows, making Daichi laugh. “My cousin is coming.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am STILL alive! I wanted to update it sooner, but then life came in and messed me up. I'm still in a mess, but going through slowly and surely. I don't know when will be next update, but it WILL be, I promise on that. Perhaps it will be sooner this time.  
> Guess who comes in next chapter? :)

Stepping out of the car, Eijun’s lips turned up in a wide smile at the sight of his house. How much he missed it—he admits. He took his bag from the backseat and walked with his father to the doors that opened, revealing an old man with grey hair and a shoulder-length brunette. He could recognise them anywhere and at any time. His mother warmly smiled while his grandfather grinned at the sight of his grandson. It made him happy that he was back, yet deep inside he felt sad and a bit disappointed that he left the school where he could become a star. 

But he couldn’t blame him. Not when he saw what a mess his grandson alone was. The eyes that were once full of life now seemed nothing more but a broken soul. He wanted to beat some sense into him, but he knew that it will only just break him more than he already was. He knew he felt sad for leaving the school, where he had friends. 

“Welcome home, Eijun.” His mother pulled him in a hug that tightened as he replied with quiet: “I am home.” 

“Let’s get you in…” She said after she pulled away. Mr Sawamura took the bag that fell on the ground before he followed with his father back into the house. 

Eijun looked around. Everything was still in the same place as he remembered, perhaps there were some things replaced or moved to another place, but the house was still the same. Without a second thought he ran up the stairs and opened the doors he thought were the right ones. And they were. He walked into his room and looked around; at the bed and table next to each other before be looked at the photos on the wall. He walked to the table and took one of the photos. He recognized himself alongside with Miyuki and Kuramochi, who had him in a headlock as the three of them were grinning, Haruichi and Furuya in the background. 

“When was this taken?” He wondered aloud before he looked at one more, on which only Kuramochi, Eijun and one more guy were on. He narrowed his eyebrows as he murmured: “Masuko…senpai?” A memory of the same guy appeared in his head. The only change was that he had light flashed from below, which made him look scary as Kuramochi had fake blood streaming down his cheeks from the “wound” on his head. He put photos on table and took a box that he spotted under. He put it on table and opened it, only to see more photos. 

“You sent those photos every months.” His grandfather’s voice startled him. Eijun looked at him before his eyes fell back on the box. His grandfather walked to his side and also looked inside. “You even sent us letters, almost every day at first, but then it came to every week. They are also in the box, under the photos.” He said before he looked at his grandson. 

Eijun was staring at all the box had, from photos to key chains that he got from his childhood friends, even a hat with all good wishes. He took the hat and blinked few times before he looked at his grandfather. “Did guys come here after I moved to Tokyo?” he asked. 

“They did, since you wrote them too.” His grandfather smiled. “Because you didn’t write their address, you sent all letters to home and they came every Tuesday, stopping as they came from school.” He shortly explained. “They missed you a lot.” His smile softened. 

“Eijun,” Mrs Sawamura called from downstairs. 

Eijun looked at his grandfather, who nudged him. “Go…” He gestured towards doors. 

“Eijun,” His mother called once again. 

Eijun looked towards doors, only now hearing familiar voices along. His eyes widened before his lips turned up in a smile. “Coming,” He called and put hat back into box before he ran out of the room. He ran down the stairs, almost bumping into his father, who walked out of the living room just in time before he stopped in front of doors that were open. 

If it could, his eyes would widen even more as his lips turned upwards in a wide smile that everyone knew him for. The ones standing in front of him were no other than his childhood friends from Akagi Junior, their lips turning in a smile that only grew wider as Eijun jumped right in between, trying to hug everyone. 

-:- 

_“The mound doesn’t need two pitchers.”_  

_“I am sorry for you to come in_ _in_ _such uncomfortable circumstances.”_  

_“I can’t pitch to the inside.”_  

_“You have yips.”_  

_“You will go with another training menu. And you are forbidden to hold ball for now.”_  

**_I am weak._**  

His eyes snapped open, staring up into the ceiling as the cool wind was blowing through his open window. He tugged on his shirt, his brown eyes staring in front. A shiver ran down his spine as he looked towards the window. The sky was slowly turning lighter. Eijun closed his eyes second later, taking a deep breath before exhaling. He repeated it few more times before he felt himself calming down. 

He laid back down on his back, hoping to get at least a bit more sleep, but couldn’t. Instead of lying around, he decided to stand up and go out on a morning walk at least. Changing into sweats and T-shirt, he spotted his phone on table lighting up, announcing a message. He took it and saw familiar name on it that made his lips turn up in a smile. 

— _Still sleeping?_  

Just as he was about to reply he got another from the same person. 

— _At times like this you were already running outside and annoying everyone_. 

A laugh came from Eijun. 

— _Wake up,_ _Bakamura_ _or I will get you in a headlock_. 

Eijun shook with his head before quickly typing a reply. 

— _I am already awake_ _senpai_ _. No need to use a headlock._  

It didn’t pass a minute that he got a reply from the same person. It made Eijun grin, knowing he was going on his nerves so early in the morning. 

— _Getting cheeky, aren’t we?_  

— _Never_  

And the conversation ended. **Probably on practice.** Eijun wondered as he put phone back on his table and left his room. He quietly walked down the stairs on the hallway where he quickly put on his shoes before leaving the house. 

It was Sunday morning. Everything was still quiet as he ran down the street. He saw a cat every now and then, cleaning their paws while the birds were flying above him before he came to a stop in front of familiar building. He was panting as he leaned on his knees, trying to calm his breathing. 

A minute later he straightened up and looked at the building once again. Memories of his friends from junior high appeared in his head as he found himself standing on the mound behind the school. He looked around, towards the bench at the side, before his eyes fell in front of him, suddenly hearing Miyuki’s voice. 

_“Come on,_ _Sawamura_ _. You are daydreaming again.” Miyuki was grinning as he threw the ball back to_ _Eijun_ _._  

_Eijun_ _raised his arm and caught it before looking towards the_ _score board_ _. They were winning against_ _Furosawa_ _High School. Looking back at Miyuki, his lips turned up in a smile before pitching once again. Yet his eyes widened second later when he saw the ball right in front of his eyes._  

Holding for his head, Eijun shook it as he opened his eyes and looked around once again. “I am thinking too much…” he murmured to himself before he left the mound and school ground. “I wonder what guys are doing…” He thought aloud while walking down the street towards his home. “I haven’t seen them in such long time as well. The only one I saw was Wakana, who brought me all things they sent.” He laughed at the memory. 

And before he knew it, he reached his home. Walking inside, he smelled the usual breakfast he always had. His lips turned up in a wide smile and he quickly took off his shoes before walking into dining room, where his grandfather was sitting and reading newspaper while his father watched television. 

“Good morning,” He greeted cheerfully and sat down next to his father’s side. 

“Good morning,” His father smiled while his grandfather only grunted in reply. “I see you were already outside. What did doctor Nawaki tell you about running?” He gave him a look that made Eijun grin. 

“I wasn’t running.” He said and gained a smack on his shoulder. 

“Wasn’t running my ass” His grandfather shouted. “Do you want to make your parents worry even more? Foolish grandson…” 

Eijun’s lips formed a pout as his father laughed and patted him on the shoulder. “If you didn’t overwork then it is fine. Just make sure you stop before it is enough, okay?” he asked. 

Eijun quietly nodded and looked at his mother that walked in, holding a plate. He quickly stood up and held a plate, making her eyes wide. “E-Eijun…” She murmured before warmly smiling. “Thank you,” She said and sat down “How did you sleep?” she asked. 

“I had some weird dreams…” Eijun scrunched his nose. “But received a message from Kuramochi-senpai when I woke up.” He grinned once again. “I bet they are practicing even though it is Sunday.” He laughed as his parents and grandfather listened without realizing that he talked more comfortably about his team than he did before. 

“He seems like a nice person.” Mrs Sawamura smiled. 

“He would be nice if he didn’t headlock me every time.” Eijun frowned. “Whenever he could he headlocks me. And others just laugh. Not to mention that Furuya always ignores me.” His frown deepened. “A-and Miyuki either ignores me…or provokes me—” He unconsciously made a fist. “—but everyone is so nice to me…” His gaze fell on table before be remembered the voices in his head. He raised his head and looked at his mother. “Why did they apologize?” 

Mrs Sawamura softly smiled. "They think it is their fault that you lost memories." She answered, Eijun's father looking at his son in worry. Eitoku folded the newspaper and looked at Eijun, who looked at his mother in confusion. 

"Why would they even...feel guilty for my memory loss?" He asked. "I mean...I know baseball is a dangerous game..." He said and looked at his breakfast in front of himself. "Whenever I asked them anything about what happened, they always either changed topic or just...left." 

Mrs Sawamura looked at her husband, quietly begging him to say something, anything. But before he could, Eitoku spoke: "Don't think too much about what happened." Eijun looked at his grandfather. "You came home to rest, so don't throw this chance away." 

-:- 

“Are you going to be fine?” Mrs Sawamura looked at her only son, while standing on the train station, waiting for the train to come. 

“Yes, mom.” Eijun answered and scrunched his nose when she caressed his cheek. “I am only staying for a while.” He said and looked at his father for help. All his father did was smile and continue watching his wife and son interacting in their last minutes together. 

"If anything happens, anything at all, call me, alright?" She asked, holding his face in her hands before pulling him in a tight embrace. "On the second thought, why don't you just stay here?" 

"Mom" Eijun whined and pulled away with a silent groan, his father laughing beside. "I promised Daichi I will go to Miyagi for holidays." He sighed when he saw her eyes tearing up. "Why are you crying now?" He asked. "I am not leaving for forever..." 

"I know," She gave a small, almost unnoticeable, nod. "Be careful, alright?" 

"I always am," Eijun grinned before he looked at his father, but soon turned to see a train arriving. He looked back at his parents. "I am going..." His voice was quieter this time. 

"Call us if anything happens." His father spoke, receiving a nod in answer. 

Eijun leaned down and picked up his bag. "I will call when I get to Miyagi." 

"Alright," Mrs Sawamura nodded, smiling. 

Eijun turned completely towards the train and took a breath in before he took a step closer. He felt his parents' eyes on his back and it made him feel calm, much calmer than he felt one minute ago. He couldn't wait to meet with his cousin he hadn't seen in a long time. 

He stepped on train and walked into cabin that was empty, sitting by window in no time. He looked outside, seeing his parents smiling at him. He couldn't help but smile back and wave with his hand before he made himself comfortable when he felt the train move. Taking off his jacket, he took his phone out of pocket along with earphones from the bag, he looked through window one last time, seeing his parents looking his way. 

He was nervous, but for some reason he also felt glad. Further he was, better he felt.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm making this note to talk about Eijun's and Daichi's age. As you see Eijun is in his 2nd year while Daichi is in 3rd year, making their age difference only for one year. I have a headcanon that Eijun is basically 3 years older than Daichi (which with help of math and wikipedias I came to this conclusion), but I changed it for this fanfiction. And about the timeline...it might (really) be messed up (too much)..

The sound of ball hitting the ground and yelling was heard from the gym and before Sawamura Eijun could peek inside, ball passed right in front of him in flash light. His eyes widened and jumped backwards as he heard voices: “Hinata, you moron!” and “I will get the ball” from inside. 

He straightened up and let out a sigh. “Why did I come here?” He wondered aloud, scratching his head as he remembered what his parents told him. 

Three hours was a long ride for the relief pitcher Eijun, yet he still managed to not think of the Seido High School as much as he did the first half of the way. And now here he was, standing in front of tall, brown haired teen, holding a ball; his eyes blinking before they fell on a dark haired teen that was walking up to them. He looked back at the brunet and handed him the ball as his lips turned up in a smile. 

“Asahi—” The dark haired teen stopped midway when he saw the reason why Asahi was standing and not going back inside. “Eijun?” he called surprised. 

“Daichi,” Eijun smiled. 

“W-what are you—Is it that day already?” Daichi frowned. 

Eijun laughed. “Yes, it is.” He answered. “I texted you when I got to train station, but since you didn’t reply I went to your house before I came here.” He shortly explained, but quietly added: "More like aunt kicked me out of the house saying she still wasn't done with dinner..." 

“Sorry about that **and** mom...” Daichi scratched his head, nervously laughing. “Let’s go in. I will introduce you to the team.” He nudged Asahi, who quietly nodded before walking in front of the two back into the gym. 

“I heard what happened.” Daichi spoke once he was sure no one could hear him except Eijun. 

Eijun looked at him in slight confusion. “Oh…” He murmured after realizing what he meant. “Incident…” he looked to the ground with a bitter chuckle. “It is funny how almost everyone knows what happened and why they are acting that way towards you, yet you don’t, but you want to.” A sigh escaped his lips. “Perhaps I really need some time away from baseball…” 

Daichi watched his cousin. He could see Eijun was bothered and angry at what has happened and he couldn’t blame him. “It is going to be fine, you will see.” He patted Eijun’s back before they stopped in front of the team that was now watching them. “Guys, coach,” he looked at everyone. “This is my cousin, Sawamura Eijun. He lives in Tokyo, but came to Miyagi Prefecture to take a small break from school.” He smiled. 

Different voices and reactions suddenly filled the gym. 

“So you are _city boy_ , huh?” Tanaka questioned, his arms crossed over his chest as he made an expression that startled Eijun. 

“Wuoh!” Hinata claimed, jumping in the air. “Do you play volleyball too? Do you know Kenma?” there was no end to his questions. 

“Tokyo…must be a nice city to live in…” Asahi spoke with a smile. 

“Hinata, you moron, stop jumping!” Kageyama hit the orange haired teen. 

In slight annoyance, Daichi’s smile became even sweeter, Sugawara nervously smiling as he tried to calm the team down while coach Ukai face palmed, knowing this would happen. Eijun, on the other hand, looked amused and began chuckling, before it turned into laughter. Daichi blinked few times before he turned to his cousin, surprise seen on his face. 

“You guys are funny,” Eijun spoke with his wide smile. He looked at startled and surprised faces before continuing. “I am Sawamura Eijun, but you can call me Eijun.” 

“It is nice to meet you, Eijun.” Sugawara smiled. “Daichi said you also play a sport, but didn’t say anything about which one. I hope you don’t mind me asking instead.” He stood by his side. 

“I was—I mean, I am playing baseball.” Eijun replied, his smile faltering a bit. “I took my leave from school for a while.” 

“Won’t your team miss you?” Hinata tilted his head to the side, frown masking his expression. 

Eijun blinked few times, his smile completely disappearing. “I…” he stammered before forcing a smile. “They will be fine without me.” Daichi looked at him in worry. "On top of that we have a short vacation either way and coach told us we can go home." Eijun lied smoothly, everyone believing him in no time, except Sugawara, who could easily see through his lie, and Daichi, who already knew the truth. 

"Eijun, why don't you sit with Yacchan and Shimizu?" Daichi asked, knowing the more his cousin talks about his friends and team, higher chance is his memories could backfire once again. 

Eijun looked at his cousin before looking at two girls that stood by Ukai's side, one smiling nervously yet warmly, while the other quietly observed him behind her glasses. He looked back at Daichi and others, smiling: "Sorry for intruding on your practice." with a short bow, but quickly jogged to the two managers, the younger one immediately ending in a comfortable conversation with him. 

"Daichi," Sugawara approached his friend. "Is your cousin going to be okay?" He asked in worry. 

Daichi looked at him in surprise but smiled. "Yeah," He nodded and looked at Eijun once more. "He will be okay." 

Eijun was quietly sitting by Yachi, watching the team play. He was so easily mesmerized, watching each and every player with interest and awe. His eyes were wide every time Hinata and Kageyama did a quick, clapping with his hands like a child that saw the most amazing play ever. He didn't miss the way coach gave him a look from the side and the way Sugawara looked at him in worry every time a ball flew their way. 

**They know** **…**  He thought, but didn't want to let it get to him. He was away from Tokyo, away from the sport he loved and he hoped his memories will return even though he knew it was much higher the possibility of him losing more memories if he tried too hard. And he didn't want to forget about Karasuno, about Yachi, Shimizu, the coach and the faculty advisor, who warmly accepted him and asked a question every now and then. He hated when he couldn't remember something. 

"Sorry, did you wait long?" Daichi approached Eijun, who was standing by stairs below, leaning on the wall. 

"Nope," Eijun grinned and straightened up, dusting off his clothes before he looked at the rest of the team that followed behind. 

"Should we catch something to eat before going home?" Sugawara looked at Daichi. 

"I…" He looked at Eijun, who was already in a conversation with Hinata. "I don't think it is a bad idea." He smiled and patted his cousin on his back, slowly starting their walk towards the Sakanoshita store. 

"Ne ne, Eijun-senpai," Hinata called, hopping in front of Eijun, his lips turned in a wide smile. "Do you know Nekoma High School?" He asked. 

"Nekoma?" Eijun repeated, tilting head to the side. Daichi was ready to interfere, but Eijun opened his mouth, eyes wide and pounded his fist into open palm. "Ah, they have that red sports jersey, right?" He asked, looking at Hinata, whose smile only widened if it were possible. "I remember their baseball team was at Seido once?" He frowned in confusion. 

"They also have a baseball team? That is so cool!" Hinata claimed, jumping up and down before Kageyama told him to calm down. 

Eijun laughed before he looked at Daichi. "Do you have any games now?" He asked, holding his hands behind his back as they walked down the street. 

"Takeda sensei hasn't told us anything yet, but coach Ukai wants us to train with The Fukurodani Academy Group again since we are getting ready for next tournament." Daichi answered with a smile. "Want to come with us?" He asked and looked back at his cousin. 

"I would love to." Eijun replied and stopped in front of store, the team walking inside while Daichi and Eijun waited outside with Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Ennoshita, Narita and Kinoshita. "Well of course if I won't be a nuisance." He scratched the side of his head, Daichi playfully hitting him in the chest. 

"What are you saying, idiot?" He snorted and looked at Hinata, who ducked down when Kageyama tried to kick him. "Can't you two for once come out normally?" He put hands on his waist and walked to the two first years', who lowered their heads. Eijun chuckled by the side, his gaze soon falling on the three second years that approached him slowly. 

"Is he always acting like a father figure?" He asked. 

"He kind of **is**  our father figure…" Ennoshita laughed. "Are you feeling alright, Eijun?" He asked, his eyes showing worry and concern. 

"Eh? Of course I am." Eijun answered with confusion. "Why?" He asked and turned his way. 

"You have been in deep thoughts during practice." Narita said. "First and second years might be a bit too energetic so if you feel uncomfortable with them it is alright to take some time away from us." He smiled gently. 

"Ah" Eijun shook with head. "It is alright," He laughed nervously. "I myself am somehow pretty energetic when it comes to baseball and am surrounded by people that are the same so I am used to it already. I couldn't completely relax in the beginning as I don't want to disturb your practice—" 

"What are you saying, idiot?" Tanaka slapped Eijun on his back, making the latter stumble forward, coughing from the impact. "We don't have many observes that want to watch us during practice, so you are always welcomed. If anyone dares to say otherwise, just point them out and we will beat them up. Right, Noya-san?" He looked at the said libero, who nodded with determination written over his face. 

"And who exactly are you going to beat up?" Daichi walked behind them, his smile ever so sweet on his lips. 

Tanaka's and Nishinoya's eyes widened, scrambling away. "N-no one" Tanaka stuttered and coughed, changing the topic in a second. "Today is such a warm weather, don't you think so Noya-san?" He asked and started observing the sky like it was the most interesting thing. 

Eijun laughed as Daichi shook with head. "Your team is funny, Daichi." He looked at his cousin, who sighed. 

"And too energetic…" He murmured under his breath and handed Eijun a small bag of meat buns. "Here, coach wants to have you this." He smiled. 

"Eh?" Eijun blinked confused. "Why?" He asked, hesitantly taking the bag. "I didn't do anything to help or anything." He said. 

"What are you saying?" Daichi smiled. "You are already part of the team even if you play baseball." He said and opened his sandwich. "Though I can already see mom will scold me for letting you eat before dinner…" He groaned, sighing seconds later. "Don't mind it, just eat…" He murmured, waving with his hand in defeat. 

"Is everyone out?" Sugawara walked outside, Asahi behind, and looked around before handing each meat buns that everyone gladly ate. 

Eijun quietly watched them interact, everyone either smiling, laughing or just talking. He liked this scene and, unknowingly, a smile crept on his lips. Taking one meat bun he took a bite, his eyes widening in a second. "This is so good!" He claimed and happily took another bite, Daichi laughing by his side, others enjoying the company of each other before they went their own way after bidding goodbye. 

-:-

"Are you comfortable?" Daichi looked at Eijun, who was lying on the futon on the ground right beside him. 

"Of course," Eijun grinned. "And why aren't you lying on bed? You didn't have to lie beside me on the ground." He pouted before smirking. "Are you afraid to sleep alone?" He wiggled his eyebrows and laughed when Daichi's cheeks turned red in embarrassment, sputtering nonsense under his breath before hitting him with his pillow. 

"Ah, pillow fight?" Eijun sat up, holding his pillow. "You are on!" He called and hit his cousin, who didn't react in time. 

Daichi let out a yelp of surprise as his back hit the ground the moment he tried to dodge the hit. He looked at Eijun, who was laughing and held for his pillow ready to hit him again, but hesitated for moment. He loved to hear Eijun's laughter. But there is no way will he let him have the last laughter. He will pay him back sooner or later, making sure that he wins. 

"Really now" The doors opened, revealing Daichi's mother, her hands on her hips, her smile visible on her face, but eyes showing nothing but a promise of unbearable pain if they don't quiet down. "It is eleven and you two are fighting with pillows. As much as I would love to, you have practice in the morning, don't you Daichi?" She asked and without letting him answer, continued. "And Eijun, your mother specifically told me that you need to take it easy. I am sure you don't want her to rush to Miyagi when she hears you got hurt during an innocent pillow fight, do you?" 

"N-no, aunt…" Eijun stuttered and held his pillow to his chest. 

"Good," Mrs Sawamura smile was now warmer. "Get some rest. You can play tomorrow as much as you want to." She said and held for doorknob. "Good night," 

"Good night~" Daichi and Eijun replied and laid back down, Mrs Sawamura turning off the light before she closed the doors behind. 

They laid in silence, listening to footsteps that grew smaller before there was nothing. Eijun laid on his side, facing Daichi, the latter doing the same. They quietly stared at each other only to burst out in laughter like children that were just caught stealing cookies from a jar. 

"I forgot how scary aunt can be." Eijun said between laughter, holding for his stomach. 

"Me too," Daichi replied and looked at Eijun once more. "I am glad you came." 

Eijun stopped laughing and laid on his back. "I am glad too." He smiled softly, silence filling the room. 

"You know," Eijun started after a moment, unable to bear the silence. "It was hard staying in the team." He admitted, frown deepening on his face. "Everyone knew me, some even expecting something, but…they were all so nice to me. My classmates, teammates, everyone…" He stopped, letting out a shaky sigh, Daichi's gaze softening. "I know it was selfish of me to leave the team in the middle of the tournament and upcoming games and practice, but I couldn't take it. It was so weird. Miyuki-senpai, the captain, got angry at me when he found out I left the first string and was back in second and for some reason I felt glad. I don't know why, but I was glad they were angry at me." 

"It is because they care for you." Daichi spoke in soft and silent voice. 

"I know…" Eijun whined, covering his eyes, smile spreading over his lips. "I am so happy that they care for me, I really am, but at the same time I am so angry at **myself**  for not being able to remember anything. All those hopes in their eyes when they see me, all those…wishes, apologies, sad looks when they think that I can't see it… I don't know what I should do anymore." He admitted, his voice cracking. 

Daichi remained silent before he spoke even in quieter voice. "I think you made a good choice to leave Tokyo and change the atmosphere a bit." He started. "Even though your teammates might feel upset or angry at you, or at themselves, that you left without a word, I am sure they understand. If I were in their position, I would like for you to take care of yourself more than make you think for the team's good. Deep inside I **would**  be selfish and ask you to stay and do ridiculous thing just to make you stay." He laughed bitterly and added in a whisper: "You have nice teammates, Eijun, don't ever forget that."

**Author's Note:**

> I will most likely write a sequel to this first fanfiction aaand yeah... It will be a part of a collection "Pieces of time".


End file.
